Gray Skies and Emerald Eyes
by Six Underground
Summary: H/D Slash. Chapter 9 up. In the passing of time, barriers can be broken. But walls can also crumble. In this case, we witness both. But how can something two boys call love survive the test of time and one's own self-destruction?
1. Chapter 1

Hi! This is Six Underground here, or Six for short. This is my first slash fic I've posted on FFN, so be gentle please! I love Harry/Draco couples, and I decided to write one! Yes, this is Slash (like I've said before), so if you don't like malexmale relationships, stop here and leave. If you do like this stuff, I hope you enjoy my fic! Will be more pairings in the future, so don't worry about missing your other fav pairings in this fic. I would love it if you R&R. I'll stop rambling and let you get on to my long awaited fic. I worked hard on it, so enjoy!  
  
Disclaimer- *whine* Do I have to? Oh, fine. I don't own Harry Potter, Draco Malfoy, or any other of the HP series characters (*cry* I wish I did though *cry*). So no suing, I ain't gotta cent.  
  
Chapter 1 The Past and Long Awaited Future  
  
~*  
  
Harry was in his room sitting on his bed, flipping through one of his schoolbooks. The Dursleys weren't home, having gone to London to shop for the day, and weren't due home for another couple of hours. This gave Harry the perfect opportunity to catch up on his homework. True, he did do some during the night, but he hadn't been able to get all of his books from the cupboard. Besides, most of the time he'd been thinking of things other than school. He put down his book and leaned over to the table beside his bed. He opened the drawer and removed the piece of parchment inside of it. On the parchment was a poem. A poem about a certain silver-eyed Slytherin. He sighed and began to read out loud.  
  
I sat, and stared at the sky thinking about anything and everything. Sometimes I wish I were in a dream, one where I never had to wake up and everything was perfect. Maybe then I could truly be happy, and live day to day with you. You are the one I desire, the one my heart yearns for every second of every day. The one that lights my soul afire, and makes my heart quicken with one look. How I long to feel your touch, to take you in my arms and hold you for all eternity. You are my one true love, and the only one I cannot have. For you see, as much as my heart needs you, you will always consider me your enemy. Since we first met we were enemies, your path in life a complete opposite of mine. You, bound by the chains of your heritage, destined to terrorize others for your master. And me, the boy with too many obligations, destined to defeat that same master for the good of people. I wish I could run away, leave everything behind. Stop being what they want, and discover the true me. If only you would return that fiery love I have for you, and then I could stare into those gray eyes forever. Maybe then, dear Draco, Maybe then will I be free to love you in peace.  
  
Harry finished with a long sigh. Draco had been plaguing his thoughts all summer. It had all started about halfway through his fourth year. The first time he heard Draco laugh. Not a snide laugh, full of cruelty, but a genuine laugh, full of happiness. A happiness that was clearly very not Draco. But all the same, Harry had heard him laugh, and from that moment, everything had changed. Now he had Draco on the mind most all the time. He just couldn't get rid of the feeling inside of him. It hadn't taken him very long to realize what this feeling was. There's no denying it. Harry Potter was in love with his supposed worst enemy, Draco Malfoy.  
  
"Oh Draco. If only you would see how much I love you. Maybe then I could have the chance to capture your heart," Harry said aloud, sighing again.  
  
"Boy!" a growl came from the doorway.  
  
Harry spun around to see his uncle standing there. His face was purple, and he didn't look very happy. Now, Harry regretted saying what he did out loud. He gulped nervously and spoke in a slightly shaky voice.  
  
"H-hello Uncle Vernon. Y-you're back early. Er.can I do anything for you? A sandwich maybe?" Harry said, a tremble passing through him.  
  
"So boy. You're even more screwed up than I thought. I never would have guessed you were a.a." Vernon said angrily, trying to say the word, but failing.  
  
"A homosexual? Yes, I am," Harry supplied the word for his uncle.  
  
"YOU'RE A FUCKING FAGGOT!" his uncle spat, and Harry cringed.  
  
"Now uncle, there's really no need to become angry over this," Harry tried in vain to avoid what was about to happen.  
  
It didn't work.  
  
"Like hell there is! I may have to put up one of your abnormalities, but this! I will not tolerate this kind of thing! We'll just have to correct this," his uncle yelled.  
  
Before Harry could protest, his uncle slapped him forcefully across the face. He staggered blinded by tears. He slumped to the floor, his legs finally failing him. That only made him worse off. Vernon had just recently purchased a pair of leather boots, and this was the perfect opportunity to 'break them in'. He kicked Harry hard, who surpressed a groan. The kicking continued for quite some time. When Vernon finally stopped the assault, Harry was covered in black and blue bruises. Blood was trickling from the side of his mouth and from a cut above his right eyebrow. But it didn't stop there. Vernon picked up the Harry's limp body and punched him hard in the mouth. He let Harry's body fall to the floor, where Harry then proceeded to cough up blood all over the carpet.  
  
"Maybe that'll teach you a lesson," his uncle hissed, "And that mess better be cleaned up before your aunt sees it and has a fit. We wouldn't want her to be upset, now, would we?"  
  
"No, sir. I'll have it cleaned up right away," was Harry's only reply. His jaw hurt like hell, and talking only made it worse.  
  
"Good. And remember, no funny business at that school of yours. If I get one more letter from one of those ruddy owls, I'll beat you so bad you won't be able to leave bed for a month. Got it?" Vernon demanded.  
  
"Yes sir," short, choppy replies. It was the only way to keep him out of trouble.  
  
"Now, clean yourself up boy. I want you downstairs starting dinner in 10 minutes," and with that, Vernon left.  
  
~3 Days Later...~  
  
As the images passed before Harry's eyes, he found it hard to believe that was only 3 days ago. At the moment, he was lying in his bed, trying not to move around too much. It hurt to move. That had been the worst beating he had ever received, and he was not about to forget it. He had a large bruise on his cheek. There were assorted cuts and bruises all over his legs, arms, chest and stomach. His whole body seemed to scream with pain. And not just physical pain.  
  
The emotional scars his aunt and uncle had left over the years was becoming innumerable. Especially over the past summer. Petunia was always finding some reason to screech at him and lock him in his room with no meals. Dudley's taunts had become more frequent, and he had broken Harry's nose several times. Vernon was the worst though. He had begun to beat Harry. Frequently. Sometimes over seemingly unimportant matters. Harry once burned the toast, and then couldn't get out of bed for the next 5 days.  
  
Why? Because the Dursley's started to believe no one would harm them. They figured everyone Harry ever dropped hints about, Minister Fudge, Dumbledore, even Sirius, were all fake. Just people Harry had made up to keep himself from being harmed.  
  
Harry turned his head to look at his clock, earning several loud cracks in his neck. He glanced at the clock. 2:39am. Harry sighed painfully and looked at his calendar. And for the first time during the entire summer, Harry smiled genuinely. Only 2 days left until Hogwarts. 2 more days, and he'd be able to return to the only place he found peace. His home, the place where he belonged. In 2 more days, he'd be able to see all his friends. In 2 more days, he'd be able to see his secret love. Who knows what would happen this year. And with that thought in his head, Harry drifted into a peaceful sleep. His first peaceful sleep in 2 months..  
  
~*  
  
Six: And there you have it! The end of the first chapter!  
  
Harry: Man, I really got the shit beaten out of me. You are so cruel! *looks down at floor sadly*  
  
Six: Oh, cheer up Harry! I have plenty of good things in store for you!  
  
Harry: *raises head* Really?  
  
Six: Of course not.  
  
Harry: *hangs head* Oh...  
  
Six: Haha, I'm just kidding. You're so gullible Harry!  
  
Harry: *blushes* Shut up.  
  
Six: Well, that's it for now people! Don't forget to review! If you do, I'll love you forever! See ya! 


	2. Chapter 2

First off, I want to apologize for the slight lateness of this chapter. I've had such a busy week, being sick, then making up homework and writing essays and convincing my parents to let me go to this awesome party. But, I pulled through and wrote chapter 2 of this story. I hope to produce chapters within a week of each other in the future. But, we'll have to see depending on my schedule. Remember, this is slash (boyxboy relationship), so if you don't like, don't read. This chapter features other couples, but not much. This chapter was longer than I expected, and I hope you enjoy it!  
  
::blah:: is thinking "blah" talking  
  
Disclaimer- I OWN NOTHING! NOW LEAVE ME ALONE YOU DAMN LAWYERS!!  
  
Thanks to: evilbunny, Bill Weasley, Soul Sister, Annie Phoenix, Kugel, Surius, Hersch, and EuropaMoon for reviewing. I love you all!!  
  
Special Thanks to: Soul Sister. Thank you, I worked hard on that poem. I had been drawing a blank for days, and it finally came to me! I love it when people like my poetry! ____________________________________________________________________________ ________________________________  
  
Chapter 2  
  
It was August 31st, the day Harry had been willing to come for over 2 months. The day he went back to Hogwarts and started his 5th year. His alarm went off, and he jumped out of bed eagerly. Not a good idea. He was still a little sore from the most recent outburst of Vernon.  
  
::Well, you deserved it you know. You should have been more careful and kept your thoughts to yourself:: he scolded himself. ::But still, did he have to beat me so bad? I could barely breath the next day, let alone move:: he contradicted. ::You know how he feels about gays. You have to keep this to yourself now on:: the other side of his brain said. ::Agreed. I don't want to be beaten again:: he promised.  
  
With his new promise in place, he went about his morning routine. He showered and dressed in a pair of very baggy jeans and a long sleeve shirt. He added a chain, which he had stolen from Dudley, just for effect. He tried in vain to tame his hair, and admired his new glasses in the mirror. How he had ever convinced his uncle to get them was beyond him. They had a slight slimmer frame, and fit his face quite well. He had developed a well- built body from all the Quidditch he played, but had still stayed relatively skinny. He had gotten taller over the summer, now reaching a little under 6'. He sighed, knowing this was going to be a LONG year trying to fend off the mobs that admired him.  
  
He tore his attention from the mirror as he heard Dudley's booming snores stop, and Vernon's gruff voice coming from the hallway. He stiffened and held his breath, hoping his uncle wouldn't come to his room. He breathed again when he heard a door close and the shower start to run. Regaining his composure, he quietly opened his door and slipped downstairs.  
  
3 minutes later bacon was in the pan along with a dozen or so eggs and toast was popping up from the toaster. Harry's moves were mechanical, grabbing the toast as he watched the bacon and eggs and deposited them onto a plate. When the food was done and on the table, he went to grab the paper and mail. When he returned to the kitchen, he wasn't surprised to see the Dursleys already there, Dudley stuffing his face. Petunia was sipping the coffee Harry had made, and Vernon was waiting impatiently for the paper. Harry handed his uncle the paper, his aunt the mail, and quickly bolted down some bacon, an egg, and 2 pieces of toast. Without saying a word he returned to his room and packed quickly, making sure he left nothing behind.  
  
An hour later he was on Platform 9 ¾ scouting for Ron and Hermione. He spotted a flash of red hair and soon found his 2 best friends and the Weasley family. Along with Mrs. and Mr. Weasley was Ginny, who was in her 4th year, Percy, Bill, and the twins. The twins were in their last year and were still planning on opening a joke shop, much to the protests of their mother. Ginny had started to grow her hair out, and framed her face quite nicely. Hermione had grown an inch or two, and had cut her hair to neck length. Ron was now about 6'1, but had broadened out.  
  
"Harry! It's great to see you again!" Hermione said extatically, hugging him tightly, "Where have you been all summer?"  
  
"Hi.Hermi.can you please let me go? Maybe?" Harry gasped. Hermione was hugging him so tight he could barely breath.  
  
"Oh! Sorry!" Hermione said sheepishly, letting him go.  
  
Ron walked up and slipped his arm around Hermione's waist. They had started going out during the summer, after Hermione came back from visiting Krum. The trip hadn't gone so well, and Hermione FINALLY realized she liked Ron. She stayed at the burrow for the rest of the summer, getting used to living like a wizard. From what Harry had heard through the letters, they both had a great summer. Lucky them.  
  
"Yeah, man. Where were you this summer," Ron said, him and Harry doing their signature handshake that they had developed over the years.  
  
"Well, two reasons really. One, I got a letter from Dumbledore saying I had to tough out the summer with the Dursleys. Two, even if I had been invited, the Dursleys were not about to let me out of their home. You could say they wanted to 'reteach' me a few things," Harry said, a little hurt in his voice.  
  
He silently cursed himself for saying that. Hermione suddenly became worried. She had heard about the Dursleys, and she worried about Harry. Ron let go of his girlfriend and put his hands on Harry's shoulders. The worry shown in his eyes. Harry suppressed a flinch from the abrupt contact on his shoulders, the bruises there still tender.  
  
"You okay man? They didn't do anything to you did they?" he asked.  
  
"What? Oh, of course not! Don't worry about me Ron. They just made me do a whole lot of garden work and cooking," Harry said quickly.  
  
Ron bought it. Harry silently found it incredible that anyone could be so naïve when it came to friends. But he dismissed the thought, knowing it wasn't Ron's fault. It was Harry's fault. All Harry's fault.  
  
"Well, lets forget about the past and move onto the future. Harry, I heard you switched classes, tell me about it?" Hermione said, sensing a bit of tension on Harry's end.  
  
"I'll tell you when we get on the train. First, I have to get my trunk loaded. Oi, Fred, George! A little help over here?" Harry called.  
  
Fred and George sauntered over, Fred peeved he hadn't gotten to tell the punchline of a joke he was in the middle of telling. After the 3 had gotten the trunk loaded, Harry, Hermione, and Ron found an empty compartment and sat down. Harry stared out the window, looking at all the happy and excited kids saying goodbye to their parents. In that second, he hated them all. Every fucking one of them. Not only did they have parents, but because they got to live in their own little world.  
  
Each one was oblivious to what was going on around them. Sure, they KNEW about Voldemort, but they didn't realize what a threat he was. All they thought about was getting good grades in school and who would ask whom out. They were all so.childish. They knew nothing of the REAL world. Harry abruptly snapped out of his thoughts when he realized Hermione was talking.  
  
".so I told him to using those cheesy pick up lines because I already had a boyfriend," Hermione was saying proudly.  
  
"That's the way to tell him Hermi! Looks like I've got some competition this year!" Ron said cheerfully, grinning.  
  
Harry managed a weak laugh. He wasn't in the mood for this. Stupid kids, always ruining his good moods. Just then the compartment door opened and George walked in. He scanned the room, and when his eyes fell on Harry, he smiled.  
  
"Harry! Just the man I wanted to see! Been looking for you everywhere mate!" he said cheerfully, sitting down next to Harry.  
  
But he didn't stop there. He put his arm around Harry's shoulder, and pushed their bodies closer together. All Harry could do was blink in shock. George put his lips to Harry's ear.  
  
"How was your summer?" he purred.  
  
"George, stop. That's not funny! Stop trying to seduce Harry! You know he doesn't go for that sort of thing!" Ron said angrily, pushing the two boys apart. George grinned even more.  
  
"Sorry little bro. Couldn't help myself. Besides, it's fun to freak out guys!" George chuckled.  
  
Harry didn't pay attention to George, though. He was glaring at Ron.  
  
"Excuse me? What do you mean by 'you know he doesn't go for that sort of thing'?" Harry said angrily, "Do you think that because I'm Harry Potter I'm automatically not allowed to like guys?"  
  
Ron stared in shock. He then proceeded to stutter something about not meaning to offend Harry and asking him if he was interested in guys.  
  
"I'm bi for your information. I would appreciate that in the future, you don't jump to conclusions," Harry said scathingly.  
  
Ron sat, trying to absorb the information given to him. Hermione's interest seemed to be struck, and George was grinning like a mad man.  
  
"So, are you interested in anyone Harry? It's okay, you can tell us!" George said happily.  
  
"Actually, I'm interested in a couple of people. In light of this fact, I propose a little.how should I put it.game," Harry said, smirking.  
  
"Game? What kind of game?" an Irish voice said from the doorway.  
  
The four turned to see Seamus and Dean standing in the doorway, Neville and Fred behind them. Seamus looked excited, and let go of Dean's hand. The four quickly piled into the room and looked at Harry keenly.  
  
"Yes, a game. The rules are simple. I like three people at school. By the end of the year, one of them will be my girlfriend OR boyfriend. Your task, you must figure out WHO I will end up with at the end of the year," Harry said  
  
"Sounds interesting. I'm in. Can you give us the names of the people?" Hermione asked.  
  
"Well, the first one is pretty obvious. Cho Chang," Harry replied.  
  
"Figured. You always went goo-goo over her. Not a pretty site," Fred cut in.  
  
"The second person is a boy. It's Justin Finch-Fletchley," Harry continued.  
  
"Nice choice! He's always been kind of cute!" Dean said, earning a pout from Seamus. They all laughed and again looked at Harry.  
  
"Well, who's the third person?" Ron asked, over his shock and looking interested in the game.  
  
"Here's the twist to this game. I'm not going to tell you who the third person is. All of you are going to have to use your observation skills to figure out who it is," Harry said, smirking.  
  
Hermione smiled. Observing things was one of her specialties. This game was already hers.  
  
"Sounds like fun!" Neville said.  
  
"Good. If all of you are in, the game starts tomorrow. Write your answers of who you think the third person is and who my new boy/girlfriend will be on a slip of parchment. I want all of your answers starting on Valentine's Day, and ending at the beginning of March," Harry explained.  
  
"Hold it. What do we get if we win?" Hermione asked.  
  
"That's also a surprised. I'll announce who I'm dating and who the winner of the game is some time before the End of the Year Banquet. The winner will then receive the mystery prize," Harry said mysteriously.  
  
"Well, I'm in," Hermione said.  
  
The others voiced their agreement. Harry smiled. This was going to be an interesting year. The others started digging for clues on who the third person. Just as Seamus asked a question about what year the person was, the door opened yet again. No one was surprised to see it was Draco Malfoy.  
  
"Oh look, it's everyone's favorite person," Hermione said sarcastically.  
  
"Shut up Granger. I don't have time to deal with your antics right now," Draco said dully, "Potter, I want a word with you. Now."  
  
Harry blinked, but then shrugged and stood. Much to the protest of the others, he followed Draco out into the hallway. He looked different to Harry. Sure, he was drop dead gorgeous. He was exactly Harry's height, if not a little bit taller. His hair was slicked back as it always was, and his eyes were that stormy gray that Harry would gladly get lost it. But there was something else. He seemed.distressed somehow. His eyes had lost that gleam and malice that was usually there. He was fidgeting, looking everywhere at once, yet never looking at Harry.  
  
"So, what did you want to talk to me about?" Harry asked, trying to get Draco to look at him. ::If only I could see his eyes. I love looking at them so much::  
  
"Okay, here's the deal. I propose a truce," Draco said quickly.  
  
"A...truce? What do you mean?" Harry asked.  
  
"Geez Potter, are you THAT dense? A truce. Due to recent...circumstances, I have decided to ease up on the insults. I'm far to busy to go around insulting you just because everyone else expects it. So, I promise to leave you alone if you promise to leave me alone. That includes Granger, Weasley, and the rest of your gang too. What do you say? Deal?" Draco said, trying to keep his voice calm.  
  
Draco's eyes looked in to Harry's pleadingly. It was astounding. Draco was practically begging for this. Personally, Harry agreed with Draco. The feud was getting tiring. He nodded his head and Draco sighed in relief. Before Harry could say anything else, Draco walked away and into another compartment. Harry stood there for a moment, thinking about what happened. Then, he walked into his compartment to tell his friends of the truce none of them would believe.  
  
~Later that night at the Great Hall~  
  
Harry sat in his seat at the Gryffindor table. The sorting had just finished and the new first years were talking excitedly to the older years. One of the new girls, Lucidia, was already hanging all over Harry. She acted much more mature than her age and laughed whenever Harry told a joke. She was sitting next to him, and was finding any excuse to touch him. Oh, he wanted her to go away so badly. But he couldn't just snap at her, that would be very un-Harry Potter like.  
  
Suddenly he felt very sick. There were too many people around him. He felt lightheaded, and he his breathing became ragged. No one noticed, though, they were all busy talking about Quidditch and classes. Lucidia was not helping. She was clinging onto his arm, asking for the butter.  
  
"Lucidia, could you please let go of me? You can reach the butter on your own. Lucidia, let go of my arm," he begged, starting to loose his patience.  
  
"But I can't reach it. It's just out of my reach. Do you think you could just hand it to me? Please?" she said in a sugary-sweet voice.  
  
She still hadn't let go of Harry's arm. His panic attack was getting worse. He could just feel the walls closing in on him. He had always known he was claustrophobic, but this was ridiculous. When Lucidia showed no signs of letting go, Harry let out an audible growl.  
  
"Lucidia, I told you to let go!" he snapped at her, "Now LET GO!"  
  
Several people turned their heads in surprise, including Draco. Lucidia released her hold on Harry's arm and stared at her plate. Tears were starting to form in her eyes as she mumbled an apology. Harry stared at her, torn between what he should do.  
  
"Lucidia, I'm the one who's sorry. I shouldn't have snapped at you like that. It's just I really wanted you to let go of my arm," Harry tried to sound apologetic, but failed.  
  
He looked around the room, scowling at the people who were still staring at him. His claustrophobia was coming back. His breath was becoming ragged again. If he hadn't been too busy trying not to pass out, he would have noticed a certain Slytherin watching him. After a minute, it was too much. He had to get out of there and fast. He was going to suffocate if he didn't.  
  
"Hey Ron, Hermi, I'm full. I'm gonna head up to the common room," he said to his friends.  
  
"But Harry you can't, Dumbledore still needs to make the announcements of the new year! Don't you want to find out who our Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher is?" Hermione said.  
  
"Hermione, you want to know the truth? I. Don't. Care." Harry was really losing his patients now, "So, I'm just going to get up and go to the common room. Goodbye."  
  
"Are you sure Harry? Do you feel sick or something? Should we take you to Madame Pomfrey?" Ron continued to badger Harry with questions.  
  
That's when Harry lost it. He was NOT going to take anymore of this.  
  
"Ron, SHUT THE HELL UP! I do not need to go to Madame Pomfrey! My God, can't you just leave me alone for one second?! I'M TIRED! Leave. Me. ALONE!" Harry yelled angrily.  
  
The hall fell silent at Harry's outburst, students confused and the teachers staring in shock. Hagrid had frozen in mid bite, a turkey leg hanging from his mouth. Ron blushed a deep crimson color as Harry's chair scrapped the floor and Harry left the Great Hall. Draco noticed how Harry's steps faltered, and wondered what had happened.  
  
No one knew of Draco's little secret. The secret he had kept since the end of his 4th year. The secret that would horrify everyone if they found out. Draco Malfoy was in love with Harry Potter. He didn't know how it happened, or why, but he knew that he was in love with the emerald-eyed Gryffindor. Over the summer, he had made a promise to himself.  
  
::I don't know what's wrong with you Harry, but I'll find out:: he thought, ::I'll find out. And I'll make you mine. By the end of the year, you WILL be mine, and only mine::  
  
~*  
  
Six: Well, that's Chapter 2! What did you guys think? I would love feed back! Again, I say that I hope to produce more chapters faster than that.  
  
Harry: What the hell? What's with the panic attack??  
  
Six: *shrug* I just thought it was a good idea.  
  
Draco: You are so mean to him! Is there any scene in this fic where he isn't a nervous wreck?  
  
Six: There are a couple. They're mostly ones that contain.intimate moments with a certain someone.*smirk*  
  
Draco: *blush*  
  
Harry: Can we talk about something else now. Please?? *blush*  
  
Six: Fine, I'll stop. Now, to all of you out there, REVIEW! Please, if you do I'll love you forever!! 


	3. Chapter 3

Bah! What a week it's been. Finishing my science lab, and then my father kicked me off the computer! So, of course, this chapter is belated by a day or two. Depends on how much my computer hates me.uh.I mean loves me. This chapter is much longer than the other two, but this to me shows signs that I'm improving. This chapter features centaurs, a slightly insane Harry, a jealous and caring (!_!) Draco, a confused Hermione, and...Ron. So, you have been warned (sort of, I guess). Okay, I'll get to the usual stuff and you can start the chapter. PLEASE REVIEW  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own anything expect the plot and the OCs that tend to pop up at will *walks off whistling and reading Prisoner to Azkaban*  
  
Thanks to: EVERYONE! There are too many of you out there who were nice enough to review (plus I can't get on the internet to look the names up @_@). So, all of you who reviewed chapter 2, I love you guys! You are the greatest!! *HUGS*  
  
"blah" is talking ::blah:: is thinking  
  
~*  
  
Chapter 3  
  
Sunlight barely peaked over the grounds that surrounded the castle. The castle was still slightly cast in shadow by the Forbidden Forest, and all the residents were asleep in their beds. In the 5th year boys Gryffindor dorm, Neville's snores were as loud as ever, and Seamus was curled up next to Dean in his bed. Ron was sleeping peacefully in his new, actual fitting pajamas, but Harry was far from content. He was fidgeting, his brow drenched in sweat. With a sudden gasp he shot straight up, his eyes wide and shocked. He was breathing heavily, and his eyes looked frantically around the room. When he realized where he was, he let out an explosive sigh of relief.  
  
::Oh man, that dream was one of the worst I've ever had. And it was so real too!:: Harry shivered at the memory of the dream, ::Is this a sort of premonition? Too bad I dropped Divination this year, I heard we study those this year. Oh well, no use in grumbling about it now. I need to clear my head.::  
  
Harry glanced at his clock and groaned softly. 5:30 am. The other residents of the castle wouldn't be up for at least another hour and a half. It was too late for Harry to fall back asleep, he was now wide awake with not a trace of sleep in his features. He glanced around at his sleeping friends, pondering what he could do to clear his thoughts. He finally decided a jog was the best thing. He needed a good work out where he could decide when to stop and where to go. It was warm out, so he stripped from his pajamas and put on a pair of shorts. He didn't care that his multiple bruises were exposed, no one would see them anyway. Besides, a long sleeve shirt would be too hot after working up a sweat. He opened his trunk, grabbed his invisibility cloak and started out. Being careful not to wake anyone, he slipped out through the portrait hole wearing the cloak, and headed to the entrance of the castle.  
  
Once outside, Harry took a deep breath. The air there was fresh and clean, and it gave him a new found burst of energy. He set off first at a brisk walk, which slowly turned to a jog, then to full blown running. This run was not as cleansing as he thought, however. No matter how hard he pushed, he could somehow see Vernon's face in front of him, taunting him, mocking him. His legs pumped harder, running past the lake and the forest, looping around Hagrid's house and running along the edge of the lake. He was running faster than he normally would, but to no avail. The picture was still there. He stopped suddenly, realizing that blacking out from running too hard was NOT the thing he needed. He walked slowly to the castle, resting his back against the cool stone, trying to catch his breath.  
  
Draco has not slept well. He'd been up late thinking, and had drifted in and out of sleep since 3am. He finally gave up on sleep and rose from his bed. He figured since no one was up, he might as well explore the grounds. Besides, the castle must be beautiful and the earliest of dawn. Not wanting to risk waking everyone else up, he slipped on a short sleeve green robe. He ran a brush through his hair, winked at the mirror, who whistled at him, and he left quietly.  
  
He was right. The castle WAS beautiful at this hour. The temperature was so nice, he figured he'd take a quick jog around the lake. Once he got 10 feet out the entrance, however, all thoughts of a jog were lost from his mind. He heard someone talking off to his left side. It sounded an awful lot like.Harry Potter? What was he doing up so early? Draco walked over and found Harry glaring at a WALL. Draco hid best he could behind a bush and watched closely, one eyebrow raised.  
  
::Why is he out here at 5:45 in the morning, talking at the wall no less. And.oh my God, is he only wearing shorts?!?!:: Draco thought, looking at Harry. Draco didn't have long to drool though.  
  
He also noticed something else. It looked like Harry had been running hard, because he was covered in sweat. The sweat showed off the large number of bruises on Harry's body. They were a sickening bluish- black color, and he had them all over the place. On his arms, his legs and thighs, and many on his chest. Draco was shocked at the number of them. Where had Harry gotten them? They certainly couldn't have come from an accident, Draco just knew it. Draco was learning he knew less and less about Harry every day. He was pulled out of his thoughts as Harry's voice got louder. Draco made sure he was completely hidden and listened.  
  
"Go away, please, go away. It's never enough! No matter how hard I try, I'll never be able to escape you! You're supposed to help me, damn it. You're supposed to be there for me! You're my fucking FAMILY for God's sake. I hate you!" Harry's voice grew louder with every sentence. Draco looked on, his eyes wide, but made no interference. What the hell was Harry talking about?  
  
"I HATE YOU VERNON! You're my fucking UNCLE! You're supposed to love me, not BEAT ME! I HATE YOU AND MY SO-CALLED AUNT AND COUSIN! I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING WRONG!" he was screaming now, his voice trembling with a mixture of sadness, anger, and hate.  
  
"Why? Damn it, WHY? Why did you have to beat me?! I didn't do anything wrong! All I did was love him, IS THAT SUCH A CRIME?! I'll never be rid of you! I HATE EVERY SINGLE FUCKING PART OF YOU VERNON! Stay the hell out of my life." his voice cracked, and he was no longer shouting. The last line sounded a lot like a plea, as if he was begging to some unknown person.  
  
With a sudden fury, Harry punched the stone wall with all his strength. A loud thud was heard as his fist came in contact with the wall, and blood slowly slid down the stone. Harry drew back his fist and looked at his now bloody knuckles. He looked at all his bruises, tears starting to form. With a strangled cry, he leaned against the wall slid down into a sitting position, sobbing. He put his face in his hands, ignoring the fact that his face was getting smeared with blood. He cried his heart out. He let out all of the anger, frustration, and sadness that had built up for 2 months in one long sob and an innumerable amount of tears.  
  
Back in his hiding place, Draco could do nothing but gasp and stare in utter disbelief. That's where he had gotten the bruises. HIS UNCLE. Draco's father had never laid a hand on him unless it was to pretend he was a Death Eater. But that had only happened only twice before. Draco had heard Harry's relatives were cruel muggles, but abuse was something entirely different.  
  
Draco had to use all of his endurance to stop himself from rushing over and hugging the breath out of Harry. It was so HARD though. The forlorn look on Harry's face was too much. His emerald eyes had gone dull and were bloodshot from all the crying. Harry had brought his knees up to his chest, making himself as small as possible. The anguish on his face was so intense, it seemed to radiate from his entire body. He started rocking back and forth, murmuring to himself. Draco felt his heart burst. He had to get out of here now. If he didn't, who knows what could happen.  
  
::Gods, if someone doesn't do something, he's going to go insane. Or worse, kill himself. And if that happened, who knows what chaos will follow. For me and the entire wizarding community. I'll help you Harry. In anyway I can. Hold on,:: Draco thought desperately as he slipped away from the bush quietly.  
  
But what to do? He had no idea how he could help Harry. After all, they had been worst enemies for 4 years! Who would believe Draco? He needed someone who was clever, practical, and observant. Who.who.then it hit him. HERMIONE GRANGER. Even if she didn't fully believe him, she was bound to pay more close attention to Harry. Draco ran all the way to his dorm and then to the owlery, parchment, a quill, and ink in his arms.  
  
After scribbling a quick note, Draco tied it to the leg of a school owl. As he watched the owl float into the air, Draco prayed Hermione would believe him. She just HAD to. He checked his watch. 6:15am.  
  
::Better get back to the commonroom,:: Draco thought, ::I only hope she comes and is as smart as they all say she is::  
  
~Great Hall (breakfast - 7:30am)  
  
Hermione entered the noisy Great Hall alone. Ron was still getting dressed, and Harry was taking a long shower. She sat down somewhere in the middle of the table and greeted her fellow house members. She filled her plate with bacon, eggs, and sausage. Propping a book up on her knee, she began to read and eat, being careful not to spill food on the book. After maybe 5 minutes, she heard a rush of wings. She looked up for her family's owl, which usually delivered the Daily Prophet. She was surprised, however, when 2 owls swooped to her, delivering their mail. One was the newspaper, but the other was a letter. She scanned through the headlines, but put the paper aside for later, and turned to her letter.  
  
'To Miss Hermione Granger,  
  
Your presence is requested at the Astronomy Tower at midnight tonight. I have something I need to tell you. COME ALONE. Do not bring Ron Weasley and especially not Harry Potter, it may effect our conversation drastically. You may bring your wand if you feel necessary, but I doubt you will need it. This is a very important matter, and you are the only one who I feel can help. This is anything but a joke, and it is not a duel. I hope to see you there.'  
  
There was no signature on it. Hermione looked at it strangely. Who sent her this letter? And why would they want to talk to her? Most importantly, why couldn't she bring Ron or Harry? She shook her head. It sounded important, she might as well go. She would definitely bring her wand, just for safety. She swiftly hid the letter as Ron and Harry walked into the Hall, Ron looking happy and Harry looking sour. They sat down quickly, Harry letting his head hang forward. Hermione shot Ron a quizzical look, who answered with a helpless shrug.  
  
"Harry? Are you okay?" Hermione asked softly.  
  
"I'm fine," he said dully, his eyes focused on his plate. Hermione's brow was knit with worry, but he ignored it and grabbed a piece of bacon.  
  
Harry was not having a good morning. After the breakdown this morning, he was physically and mentally exhausted. He had stayed sobbing on the wall for a half an hour. He finally realized that being caught in that position would only cause more trouble, he weakly pushed himself up. Throwing the cloak over him, he had scrambled back to the commonroom, nearly slamming into Filch on the way. Once he was back in the dorm, he had taken a long, hot shower. He then dressed, and gone down in time to see Ron practically bouncing off the walls. As they went down to the Great Hall, Ron chatted happily about classes and Quidditch, while Harry could only return a small smile. And now, Hermione was worried about him. Just peachy.  
  
Harry looked up from his plate only to see most of the girls in the great hall sending him winks and puppy-dog eyes. He nearly threw up. Lucidia seemed to have forgotten last nights events, because she was openly staring at Harry with misty eyes. Harry shrank, trying to make himself as small as possible. He looked around the Hall, and his eyes settled on Draco. He was looking perfect, as usual. He was conversing with Blaise, throwing his head back slightly when he laughed. Harry was captivated by him. He saw Draco turn from Blaise and glance in his direction. Their eyes locked a look of concern flashed through Draco's face. Draco quickly looked away and at his plate, then put on his smirk and started talking with Crabbe. Harry raised an eyebrow, but shrugged it off, and began staring at his plate again.  
  
"Guys, I'm going to head back now. I need to go collect my stuff for our first class," Harry said, suddenly losing his appetite, "What is our first class again?"  
  
"Herbology. It's okay Harry, we have plenty of time. Besides, you've hardly eaten a thing this morning and you didn't eat anything at the feast last night!" Hermione said, putting on a slightly motherly tone.  
  
"I ate. You just weren't paying attention. And anyways, I'm not that hungry," Harry said swiftly, a slightly cold edge in his voice. He then muttered under his breath, "It's not like you actually care."  
  
Both Ron and Hermione heard the last comment, and Hermione was about to interject when Ron placed a hand on her arm. Harry stood up and slowly made his way out of the Hall. His expression was still sour and he shot a few people glares that said 'If-you-mess-with-me-I'll-kill-you'. Hermione turned to Ron angrily.  
  
"What did you stop me for?! You heard what he said!" she said loudly and angrily.  
  
"Keep your voice down, Hermi. Harry's in a really bad mood, that much is obvious. Let's try and keep the arguments to a minimum for a day or two until he cools down. Okay?" Ron said softly.  
  
Hermione sighed and returned to her breakfast. Her thoughts wandered back to the letter. 'And especially not Harry Potter' it had said. Was there a connection there in any way? ::Well,:: she thought to herself, ::guess I'll just have to wait until tonight to find out::  
  
~*  
  
Harry's day didn't improve a bit when the afternoon rolled around. Herbology was an near disaster. His concentration had been shot to hell after his jog, and he had slashed his hand on a large thorn located on the side of the Emilia plant he had been pruning. Charms was no better. They did a review of basic spells, and he had accidentally sent Flitwick flying out the window. Both events had resulted in double homework for him. After a quick lunch, where he finally ate something of an appropriate amount, it was back to the commonroom for 10 minutes and then off to Care of Magical Creatures.  
  
The Slytherins were already gathered in front of Hagrid's house. They were talking and snickering, all except for Draco. He was watching the Gryffindors come down the lawn, or, he was watching Harry come down the lawn. He was trying extremely hard to hide his concern, and so far he was succeeding. As the 2 houses met, Harry stayed off to the side and sat down. He plucked at the sun-kissed green grass and began shredding it. Just then, Hagrid came out.  
  
"Alright class, gather round 'ere," he called.  
  
Harry reluctantly rose and stood with the group. As Hagrid started to describe the day's lesson, he tuned everything out. He just stood there, looking at his feet. His head snapped forward as he felt someone shaking him lightly.  
  
"Come on Potter, time to head out into the forest," Draco said, removing his hand from Harry's shoulder. There was no malice in his voice, nor should there be, considering the truce that was called.  
  
"Forest? WHAT?" Harry said stunned.  
  
"The Forbidden Forest, Harry. Weren't you paying attention?" Hermione asked as Draco walked off.  
  
"Not really," he mumbled, embarrassed.  
  
"Oh Harry! You should try listening to Hagrid. We're going into the forest to meet up with some centaurs. Said it was a sort of first day treat," Hermione explained.  
  
"Did.did he pair us up with one of the centaurs yet?" Harry asked, still a little bit embarrassed.  
  
"Not yet. We better hurry up, or we're going to loose the class," Hermione said grabbing Harry's arm and dragging him off.  
  
They quickly caught up with the class and they went deeper into the forest. They soon entered a clearing, with the sun just peaking through the trees. Harry gasped.  
  
"What is it?" Ron asked.  
  
"This.this is where me and Malfoy found the dead unicorn back in our first year. This is also where I saw.saw." he trailed off as his voice failed him.  
  
Ron nodded and they turned their attention to Hagrid, who was beaming.  
  
"Now, usually centaurs keep themselves to themselves," Harry smiled as he remembered that line from his first year, "But they've agreed to come out for a day or two. They already know who their partner is, and they'll be tellin' you about what they read, and maybe they'll give you a few clues about the upcomin' year. That is, if you can decipher what they day. Centaurs, in my opinion, are just ruddy stargazers, but if you can work out what they're sayin', they can be very helpful. Be sure to keep that in mind."  
  
Just then the centaurs arrived. Harry had never seen so many together at once. He recognized Bane, who was standing at the back, looking gruff. He also saw Ronan, who gave him a small smile. Harry smiled back, and bit back a laugh when he saw the other students, whose, with the exception of Hermione, eyes happened to be popping out of their heads. Hagrid cleared his throat, getting the attention of both the students and the centaurs.  
  
"Now, lets get you all paired off. For starters, Hermione, you've got Bane. Bane, be nice, you know this one," Hagrid smiled as Bane gave a nod, "Ron, you've got the chocolate colored one, her name is Miaza."  
  
A chocolate colored centaur stepped forward. She had black hair that seemed to shine on it's own tied back in a ponytail, and was wearing a shirt made out of brown cloth. She smiled at Ron and they went to where Hermione and Bane were standing. They continued to be paired off, until only Ronan, Draco, Harry, and a slightly familiar looking centaur with blonde hair remained.  
  
"Draco, you're paired with Ronan, so that leaves you with Firenze, Harry. Now, you all have some time, so get to talking!" Hagrid finished.  
  
Harry was shocked. This was Firenze? No wonder he looked familiar! Only, his hair had grown more blonde instead of white. Firenze walked over and Harry stared.  
  
"Hello Harry Potter. It's been quite a while hasn't it?" Firenze said, his voice a little misty.  
  
"You bet! Almost four years in fact. You look different. When did you go full blonde?" Harry asked.  
  
"They say that maturity does things to one," Firenze answered, smiling slightly. Harry snorted and his features turned cold for a moment.  
  
"You can say that again," Harry said, a little coldly. Firenze smiled turned to a frown.  
  
"Why don't you climb on my back, just like in your first year. We'll go somewhere more secluded and I will tell you what I have seen," Firenze offered.  
  
Harry blinked, but gladly climbed up on Firenze's back. They heard a snort from Bane's direction, but ignored it. Firenze moved swiftly to the outer corner of the clearing and for a moment they were silent.  
  
"You know don't you," Harry said suddenly, "You know about Vernon."  
  
"The sky tells all, if you know how to look," came the reply.  
  
"What else have you seen?" Harry asked.  
  
"I have seen many things in my lifetime Harry Potter. Many things," Firenze answered.  
  
Harry sighed mournfully. He had hoped that he could maybe get some answers about his future, but the prospects didn't look good. Harry leaned up against Firenze's neck and stroked the blonde hair, a painfully sad look on his face.  
  
"Oh Firenze, what's going to happen to me? I wake up each day not knowing where life is taking me. Lately, things seem to be tearing me apart. It's like.two paths have been lain out before me, and I want to go down both. What will happen with Voldemort? What will happen to all my friends, to everyone? And most of all, will.will.will it ever work out?" as Harry spoke the last line, he looked over at Draco, tears shimmering in his eyes.  
  
Firenze was surprised. He knew all about what was happening with Harry, even his feelings about Draco Malfoy. But, Harry was not taking it as well as he suspected. The strong Harry Potter had been torn apart by sorrow and depression. The stars had not predicted this in quite such a manner. Firenze hesitated, but he eventually caved in. He knew he was supposed to be keeping this a secret, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. Besides, what was the harm in dropping a few hints?  
  
"Harry Potter, you must remember to stay strong. If you fall, others will fall with you," Firenze said. Harry sighed again.  
  
"Isn't that the way it always is? It's like I'm the pillar that the structure depends on to stand. It's not all that easy you know, doing this all alone," Harry said sadly.  
  
"So why do it alone?" Firenze asked.  
  
"What do you mean?" Harry inquired.  
  
"I mean, why do it alone? Harry Potter, your destiny is intertwined with another. Think of it as you are the Yin, the light, and you are looking for the Yang, the dark. You will find your Yang very soon. Cherish that person. Depend on them and let them depend on you," Firenze said softly.  
  
As Harry and Firenze continued to talk, others were having interesting conversations with their centaurs. Draco watched as Harry gave Firenze a hug, and felt a twang of jealousy in his stomach. He turned to Ronan.  
  
"Harry and Firenze are very close," he commented.  
  
"So they are. Ever since Firenze saved Harry, they've had a bond," if this confused Draco, he did not show it, "You observe Harry Potter much Draco Malfoy."  
  
"Well.I.um.that is." Draco stuttered, blushing lightly.  
  
"Keep what you learn close. What you see may be of use to you in the near future," Ronan said.  
  
Draco thought of his meeting with Hermione tonight, and nodded. Over with Miaza and Ron, they had been having a nice conversation about Hermione. Remembering something, Ron changed the subject.  
  
"What about Harry? He's been acting strange lately," Ron admitted.  
  
"Keep your eyes and your mind open Ronald Weasley. You may not know it, but words do have an effect on Harry Potter. You are his best friend, are you not?" Miaza asked. She had a sweet voice that almost rang out.  
  
"Yes," Ron replied.  
  
"And you would accept anything he told you?" she continued?  
  
"Absolutely," Ron said confidently.  
  
"Never be so sure. Keep your words in you mind. Remember them in times of trouble," Miaza said mysteriously.  
  
Ron could do nothing else but nod. Near them, Hermione and Bane had gotten along fairly well, despite the tension that hung in the air. Bane felt that Hermione -who never believed in divination- compromised his entire belief, but said nothing.  
  
"Keep your eyes open Hermione Granger. You know that things are never what they seem," Bane said in a gruff voice.  
  
"I've had plenty experience to know that fact, yes," Hermione answered.  
  
"Always try to see things with a clear eye. Do not let emotions blind your perception. Even the simplest of things -or people- hold something deeper. Help them with the knowledge you posses and even the knowledge you never knew you had. Do not let courage and bravery get in the way of things. Step back when you know you are not needed, but be there when you are," Bane said, looking up at the trees.  
  
"Something is going to happen to drastically change everything we ever knew, isn't there," Hermione said softly.  
  
"Good girl. Do not try and pry too much, you will be finding out sooner than you think. Remember my words. Use them in any way you can," Bane said, his tone softening, thinking about the future ahead for Hermione and her friends.  
  
"Alright! Time to be headin' out! The lesson is over for today. You'll see your centaurs again next lesson and various times throughout the year. Let's get goin'," Hagrid's voice boomed from behind them.  
  
The students bid farewell to their centaurs, and Harry gave Firenze another hug, who gladly nuzzled Harry's neck. Harry grinned and went to meet up with Ron and Hermione, who were holding hands and talking. The three made their way out of the forest and back to the castle for their last class of the day.  
  
Draco felt another twang of jealousy when he saw Harry and Firenze so close, but pushed it aside. He had more important things to worry about. Like his meeting tonight. Heading back to his dorm to get his Transfiguration books, he thought deeply about the episode that would surely take place at the Astronomy Tower later that night.  
  
~*  
  
Six: My goodness, wasn't that long? My hand is all cramped now.  
  
Harry: Those centaurs are smart creatures. Hm.intertwined destinies, got any hints for us Six?  
  
Six: Sorry guys, you'll have to find that out later.  
  
Draco: Ronan confused me... *sweatdrop*  
  
Harry: It's okay, Firenze can be confusing too.  
  
Six: Will you two shut up? I'm trying to end the damn chapter!  
  
Draco and Harry: *clamps hands over mouths*  
  
Six: Good. Now, I hope you enjoyed this belated, long chapter. I feel that my writing is improving, but I would LOVE your opinion. You know what that means. PLEASE GIVE FEEDBACK! I'm starting the next chapter right away, and hopefully my father won't kick me off the internet. And that reminds me, I have to go finish that homework *sweatdrop*, review please. See ya! 


	4. Chapter 4

Now, I know what you are all thinking. Why is this update so late?! I'll tell you. I recently went on vacation from school, and figured I would have some free time. WRONG. First it was bleaching and dying hair with friends on Saturday (although I do love my new blonde streaks), chores all Sunday, party at my house on Monday, party at another friend's house Tuesday. Wednesday I couldn't go over to my friends house, but instead I was kicked off the computer due to homework. Thursday I went over to my best friend's house for a water fight (lots of fun) and slept over. I got home at 12:30 today. I was lucky I finished this chapter by today! Now, after I post this chapter, it's chores, over to a friends house for another party, then Saturday and Sunday is finishing homework. Ain't my schedule grand? So, I apologize for the lateness of this chapter. I'll make it up to you guys somehow in the future (suggestions might be nice, nothing too big though). Okay, on to business.  
  
I want to thank EVERYONE who reviewed! You guys are the best! Honestly, I didn't think my stories would get so many reviews so quickly, I love you guys! Please, keep reviewing and I'll write more! THANK YOU SO MUCH! *hugs*  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own anything except for the plot. Although, if I did own it, you can bet Pansy would be dead and Harry and Draco would be having a lot more fun in broom closets *hentai grin*. But yeah, I don't own anything.  
  
I don't know how long these chapters are going to be, it depends on A) the events of the chapter, and B) how big a creative mood I'm in. To tell the truth, I'm sorta winging it, but never fear! I have the plot mapped out.  
  
"blah" is speaking ::blah:: is thoughts  
  
Warning: This chapter contains CUTTING (that's right, self mutilation), a very emotional Draco and Hermione, a screwed up Harry, and slight *N SYNC bashing. Is a bit more serious than the other chapters, beware.  
  
~*  
  
Chapter 4  
  
Draco sat in an armchair in front of the fire of the Slytherin commonroom. He had a book in his lap, and he was staring at the pages. He could not read, however. His mind was focused on his meeting in the Astronomy Tower. He was so nervous. How would Hermione act? Would she believe him? Would she turn and walk away at the mere sight of him? He began to panic.  
  
::Draco, snap out of it! You knew you were taking a big risk, but you did it anyway! So suck it up and deal with whatever happens. Besides:: Draco thought to himself, ::if she doesn't listen, at least you know you tried. Then, you'll just have to try and help Harry in another way. There isn't anyway you can ignore him after what you saw this morning::  
  
Draco sighed and thought about what he was going to actually say to Hermione. It wasn't going to be easy, that much was clear. But he'd try, damn it. He'd try as hard as he possibly could. Hopefully, Hermione would walk away from the meeting a little more cautious about her best friend than before. Draco became so wrapped up in his own thoughts that he didn't notice Pansy come and sit next to him. Her shrill voice made Draco jump.  
  
"Drakie-poo! There you are! I've been looking all over the place for you. What are you doing?" her voice was sugary-sweet. Draco nearly gagged, but kept his eyes on the pages.  
  
"I'm reading," was his reply.  
  
"Is it a good book?" she asked. She slowly moved closer to Draco; now nearly pushed up against him.  
  
"I think so," he said dully, still not looking up.  
  
"Can I borrow it sometime then?" her voice was starting to give Draco a headache. He scowled and turned to look at her.  
  
"Whatever, Pansy. Can you go away now? I'm trying to read peacefully and your banshee-like voice is really not helping," he said coldly.  
  
Pansy blinked. Draco wondered if the girl was really that dense. It appeared that she was. That, or deaf...or very persistent.  
  
"Oh, okay! I'll go now, and maybe later we'll spend some time together. I know of something that might interest you. See you, sweetie," she purred in his ear.  
  
Pansy walked off, completely unfazed by what Draco had said. He looked at her retreating back with utter disgust. Something that might interest him? Draco shuddered. He knew exactly what she was talking about, and cringed at the very notion. Draco shook his head and looked at his watch, which read 11:07pm. Draco sighed, this was going to be a long night.  
  
Hermione was in her dorm, pacing. Lavender and Parvati were downstairs, probably flirting with the 2 sixth year boys she had seen them sitting with at dinner. Hermione didn't mind that though, they were never much for conversation. Having Trelawny as your idle was not Hermione's cup of tea. Always talking about what they'd seen, never what was fact. Besides, she had other things on her mind. In just 40 minutes, she'd be off to meet this mysterious person in the Astronomy Tower.  
  
But was this person a mystery? Hermione had a hunch she knew who the person was. She believed it was Draco Malfoy. She had worked with Malfoy a couple times in Potion, and had seen his handwriting a fair few times. She had, of course, memorized what it looked like. You never know when a thing like that could come in handy, she always said. And the handwriting looked so similar to his. But she could be wrong. She had no idea why Malfoy would want to talk to her. She knew he and Harry had called a truce, but she didn't expect him to seek her out for any reason besides taunting and duels. And somehow, she knew it wasn't either of these things. Even though it had been only a day, his personality around her and her friends had changed drastically. She caught him looking at Harry as he stormed out of the Great Hall that morning with a look of almost.concern, she would call it. That was the real kicker. Why would Draco Malfoy be *concerned* about Harry. Hermione pondered this for a while, but came up with nothing. She just didn't understand it.  
  
Hermione stopped her pacing and glanced at her watch. It was a beautiful aqua color, a gift from Ron for her birthday that summer. She was shocked that it was now 11:40. Wow, time sure does fly when you're in deep thought. She sighed and figured she would go to the commonroom for the remaining 10 to 15 minutes she had. The guys would be heading up to the dorm soon. Or, Harry would, and Ron would sprint after him. Hermione knew Ron was becoming very concerned. He too was noticing that Harry was acting strangely. But, no time to think about that now. She grabbed her black cloak and headed down the steps and to the slowly emptying commonroom.  
  
~Astronomy Tower, 12:05 am~  
  
Draco looked out the window and then at his watch, extremely nervous. He had spent the last 50 minutes trying to come up with what to say, and nothing had come to him. At 11:50, he had left the commonroom, telling Pansy he was going for a walk and to bug off. Now, here he was. He didn't know what in the world had possessed him to write the letter, but he had done it and now was the point of no turning back. He heard the door creak open and he tensed. It was now or never.  
  
"I figured it was you who sent me that letter," Hermione's voice drifted from the darkened doorway.  
  
"Clever. I sort of figured you would," he commented, trying to keep his cool.  
  
Hermione stepped into the moonlight and removed the hood of her cloak. Her face was torn with conflicting emotions. Confusion, annoyance, even some curiosity. Draco leapt down from his perch in the window and faced her, a surprisingly calm look on his face, considering he was almost dying of nervousness inside.  
  
"Would you like to sit down?" he offered, gesturing to a chair.  
  
"No thank you," was her stiff reply, "Why did you call me here?"  
  
"I thought you knew. I wanted to talk to you," Draco said, ever so slightly amused.  
  
"Cut the crap Malfoy, I don't have all night. I had to feed Ron a ridiculous lie and I don't want him to follow me. So stop bullshitting around and get to the point," Hermione said, agitated.  
  
"Woah, down girl. There's no need to be pissy, I'm not here to hurt you or insult you. I wanted to talk to you about Harry," he said, sitting in a chair.  
  
She looked at him, substantially surprised. Draco again gestured to the chair facing him. She weakly nodded and plopped down into the squishy seat. Draco folded his hands in his lap and looked at Hermione.  
  
"Wh-what about Harry?" Hermione asked shakily.  
  
"First off, being his friend, I know you've noticed his recent behavior. Don't you think it's been a little.different? Like he's changed some way, and it's not a good thing?" Draco asked.  
  
"I have noticed. Ron too. He seems so different now. Very distracted and a little cold. Even to his friends," Hermione replied, eyeing Draco. She decided he was serious and told him the truth.  
  
"Has he mentioned anything that happened to him over the summer? Anything at all?" Draco asked, a hint of pleading in his voice.  
  
"No, he hasn't. He wasn't allowed to go to Ron's house over the summer, and he sent few letters. All of them seemed cheerful enough, except he never mentioned his uncle," Hermione said, a little scared at where the conversation was going.  
  
"Oh gods, his uncle?" Draco said, shock written all over his features.  
  
"Yes, his uncle. Malfoy, what are you trying to tell me?" Hermione asked, growing even more scared by the minute.  
  
"Call me Draco," he said quietly.  
  
"Excuse me?" Hermione said.  
  
"I said, call me Draco. Considering the events that have happened, I would prefer if you used my first name, Hermione," Draco repeated.  
  
"Okay.Draco," Hermione said uncertainly, "What's going on?"  
  
Draco sighed and looked away for a second, as if trying to gather all his courage. He turned his gaze back to Hermione, his eyes shining.  
  
"I saw something this morning. More disturbing than anything I have ever seen. And believe me, I've seen my share of disturbing things," Draco said.  
  
"I don't doubt that," Hermione murmured, then said, "Continue. What exactly did you see?"  
  
"It was about 5:45 this morning. I had gone out for a jog, but stopped when I heard a voice. It was Harry," he continued, his eyes shining with a new distress, "he.he."  
  
"He what?" Hermione's voice was now showing the fear she was feeling.  
  
"He had been running, I suppose. He was soaked with sweat. I saw bruises, so many bruises. All over the place. He was yelling, screaming at a wall," tears began to collect in his gray eyes.  
  
"What was he saying?"  
  
"He was talking about his uncle. He was saying.saying.oh gods it was terrible!" Draco choked.  
  
Hermione looked at the boy before her. So different from what she had ever known. She pushed back her fear and looked at him.  
  
"Please. Tell me what he said. It's okay, you can trust me," Hermione said gently.  
  
Draco nodded and began to retell what he had seen. Visions flashed before his eyes and his voice grew more distraught. Hermione sat there, stunned. Draco's words were horrible. What had happened to Harry?! At the point where Draco recalled Harry punching the wall, Hermione gasped and covered her mouth with her hand. When Draco finished, they sat in silence for a while.  
  
"Draco, what does this mean?" Hermione whispered.  
  
"I don't know. You should have seen him, he was a wreck. Something happened over the summer that changed him drastically. It wasn't just the beatings. Something else happened, I can *feel* it," Draco said, looking at his lap, "I'm afraid Hermione."  
  
"What do you mean?" Hermione asked him, looking at him with terror.  
  
"I'm afraid of what he might do. I've seen people. People who've been through just what Harry's been through," Draco said, shaking slightly.  
  
"What happened to them?" Hermione asked, her terror increasing.  
  
"They.they..killed themselves," Draco whispered, "He's being pushed, I know he is. I don't want him to commit suicide."  
  
Hermione shook violently. Harry.commit suicide? It was more terrible than she could ever imagine.  
  
"What do you want me to do?" Hermione asked, almost desperately.  
  
"Please, watch over him. Help him in any way you can. Try to prevent this," Draco said.  
  
"I'll do what I can. Ron needs to know," Hermione said.  
  
"Don't tell him everything, but get him to help. You two are the only ones I know who can help him," Draco said.  
  
"But why? Why are you telling me all this? I thought you hated him!" Hermione cried.  
  
"This have changed, changed drastically," was his only reply.  
  
Hermione sat and thought. Suddenly it all clicked. The truce, the attitude, the looks, this entire meeting. They're all connected. Hermione gasped and Draco looked at her sharply.  
  
"You.you like Harry! Don't you!" she whispered incredulously.  
  
Draco looked down at his hands. Damn! She wasn't supposed to figure out that much! This could be bad.  
  
"Wh-what if I do?" he asked lowly.  
  
"It all fits! It all makes sense now!" she whispered.  
  
"Please, you can't tell anyone about this. Please, I beg you!" Draco pleaded, "If word got out to people I could be *dead*!"  
  
Hermione looked at him and smiled, "I won't tell anyone. I promise. You can trust me with your secret. But I have to be able to trust you," her expression went grave.  
  
"I swear you can trust me! I wouldn't be here if I thought you wouldn't trust me! I'm doing this for Harry, you have to trust me," Draco said, his eyes true.  
  
"I don't know if this is a mistake, but I will. I'll trust you. From what you've told me tonight, it looks like I need to," Hermione said with a small smile, then turned serious again, "There's one thing I need to know."  
  
"Name it."  
  
"Are you or your father a Death Eater?" she asked.  
  
"Believe it or not, neither me *nor* my father are Death Eaters. My father works as a spy for Professor Dumbledore. My entire manner around you and your friends has been a façade. There are Death Eater children in *all* of the houses here at Hogwarts, so I needed to keep up an impression so my family wouldn't be suspected. And no, I would not trade Harry in for You- Know-Who," Draco said, reading Hermione's expression, "The only reason I'm taking such a big risk by calling this truce is because of Harry."  
  
"I want to thank you for telling me all this. For some reason, I believe you are telling the truth. I see now why you didn't want me to bring Ron. He can be a little closed-minded sometimes. Don't worry, all of your secrets are safe with me. Who knows, I might even try and help you catch Harry," Hermione smiled at Draco's astonished look, "Well, I better leave. We've been talking for.oh! an hour and a half! I need to get back to the commonroom!"  
  
Before another word could be said, she rose and hurried down the steps. Draco blinked, then smiled to himself. This went so much better than he had predicted. Maybe things would look up from now on. Maybe this would turn out okay. Walking back to the Slytherin dorm, Draco had no idea how bad things really were.  
  
~*  
  
They always say that the dagger is an exquisite thing. The saying was pretty corny, but so true to Harry. Twirling the knife between his fingers, he watched it glint in the light from his lone candle. He had picked it up in Knockturn Alley over the summer, knowing he would need one. He had been in Diagon Alley, and taken a wrong turn. Walking into the shop where he had seen Draco the year before, an gorgeous dagger caught his eye. A golden handle, sapphires woven into an intricate design. The blade pure steel, he had paid a good 50 galleons for it. He had been lucky to find one so cheap, it was said to be cursed. It was worth it though.  
  
And so Harry sat, the knife in his right hand, sitting on his bed. The curtains were drawn, a silencing charm put up around his bed. Lucky Dean and Seamus had taught him that handy little spell. Though those two had different, um.*motives* for it, Harry still appreciated knowing it. He had used it a couple times last year, and would have used it over the summer if it wasn't for that damned rule.  
  
The main reason for the silencing charm was that he loved to play music whilst he stayed up late and cut. Of course, at the Dursleys he had to remember to keep it soft, but here he could have it as loud as he wanted. He took out his CDs, they were mostly American rock bands. Godsmack, Slipknot, some Staind, a little Green Day...what the fuck?! *N SYNC?! How the hell did *that* get into his collection? Ugh...Dudley must have left it there while rummaging through Harry's stuff. Oh well, Harry figured it might go well in the fire on those cold winter nights. He sifted through his collection until he found his Bright Eyes CD and put it in his CD player, complete with speakers that went to a much higher volume than many others. He silently thanked Dudley's stupidity to just leave it lying around unused. He charmed the player so it would actually play, and turned it up to medium volume.  
  
As the music flowed around him, he stared at the blade, which was gleaming wickedly. He brought it to the skin on his wrist and pressed lightly. Sliding the blade, he watched the cut form. This was for everything that had ever happened to him. He stopped and cut another area. This was for everyone's lives he's ruined. This cut was for his mother, the next for his father. The next was for Cedric and his family. Another for Sirius. He had ruined all of their lives, each in one way or another. His parents died protecting him. Cedric had died on account of Harry's sheer stupidity. Cedric's family had to suffer the loss of their dead son. Sirius was sent to Azkaban, he was on the run, taking risks just to keep Harry safe. Keeping Harry safe was the number one priority, it comes before everything else. Why? WHY? How could he be so important that people he sometimes didn't even know would die for him? Oh, of course. He was the bloody fucking Boy Who Lived. Wonder Boy with the damned scar on his forehead, the symbolism of his ability to live. He considered it damn luck. If it weren't for him, his parents might still be alive!  
  
No, no. For that he had to blame Voldemort. That bastard had messed up Harry's entire life. He deserved to rot in hell for the rest of time. Harry gasped as the blade went deeper into his arm. That was for you, Voldie. It's what you wanted, isn't it? No need to try and kill little Harry Potter, Harry would do it for him! Harry was tired of fighting. Tired of everything. Why couldn't the world just leave him alone?! He was a 15 year old trapped in a world where he was expected to be an adult. Not just an adult, but a kind of super being. No matter how many times Dumbledore told him he was great and that he understood how Harry felt, the truth was, he didn't.  
  
Dumbledore could never understand how Harry felt. A young person's psyche was so fragile, and Harry's had been broken, ripped apart, put back together, and twisted.repeatedly. He couldn't tell the truth from the lies anymore. Everything was distorted. Nothing made sense. Things were always changing. Changing so fast that Harry felt he had nothing to depend on. Sure, he had friends, but they were all busy with their own, normal lives, with their boyfriends and girlfriends and secret crushes. They were all moving on with their lives, while Harry was stuck replaying the memories of his past over and over again. Nothing was ever constant in his life. He needed someone. Someone to talk to, to hold to....love. Draco...  
  
He wanted Draco to be the constant in his life. The one he could depend on, and the one that would depend on him. He never understood why. Maybe it was because they lived completely opposite lives, maybe it was because he was going insane. Or maybe it was because it just felt right. He felt that pull, that need to know Draco better, get close to him. It was becoming stronger than ever. But it wouldn't happen. Things were not meant to be for him. Not only had Draco hated him for years, though they called a truce, it would never amount to anything more than rivalry. Yes, that rivalry gave him a sort of thrill, but it wasn't the same. The fact that it would never work out made Harry go even closer to the edge. It wasn't just a silly crush, no. This was different from anything else he had known. Nothing he had ever felt for Cho compared to this feeling. It was so amazing and wonderful, yet so painful and excruciating all at the same time.  
  
Harry looked at the knife, which was stained slightly with his blood. He glanced at his arm, ::Fuck, so much blood:: he thought, and began to wipe off his arm with the towel he'd stolen. He moved to his ankles, slicing thin lines across the pale skin. Not enough to bleed, but hard enough to hurt. Pain on the outside masks the pain on the inside. Sure, it doesn't completely take away the pain on the inside, but as long as he had the dagger, ::So beautiful:: he added, he could forget about all that. He stopped finally when he realized the sky was starting to lighten, and used a major cleaning spell on his sheets and pillows. He crept into the bathroom and scrubbed at the towel furiously. He didn't have the strength for another cleaning spell, and he had classes. ::Ugh, potions today, fun with Snape:: he thought bitterly, ::It looks substantially lighter. The house elfs will probably think one of the guys dyed their hair. What a crazy fad::  
  
He dumped the sopping towel into the dirty linen basket and went back to his bed, knowing he wouldn't sleep. Oh, it wasn't uncommon for him to get only 5 hours of sleep in one week, but hey, it's not like anyone would care.  
  
~*  
  
Six: There you go, another chapter done. I'm working on chapter number 5, hopefully my schedule will permit me to get it out on time. I don't mean to be a bother, but REVIEW!  
  
Draco: *mumbles* You're always a bother.  
  
Six: *smacks Draco over head with over-inflated plastic hammer toy and grins* 'Scuse Draco, he's a bit...sensitive *snicker* at this point. Anyway, I want to say that if you review, I'LL LOVE YOU FOREVER! See ya! 


	5. Chapter 5

I have only one thing to say for the lateness of this chapter. I HATE WRITER'S BLOCK! My muse flew away like a little birdie and I was left sitting in front of my computer, drawing a total blank. I shouldn't really be sitting here now, seeing as how I have a fever and feel utterly crappy. But, I'm trying to appease y'all by getting this chapter out. I would like to apologize for any tense changes in the middle of paragraphs, my mind is so warped I can't see the difference from past and present tense. I would also like to apologize for the lousiness of this chapter. I hit a little snag, but I can guarantee you the chapters ahead should be good. So, here's the belated chapter I've been trying really hard to get out. This is kind of a in-between chapter, and I personally find these so hard to write.  
  
Yeah, thanks to you all who reviewed the chapters. I now love all of you. *Gives readers and reviewers roses and chocolate and such and gives self aspirin and cough medicine*  
  
For the little key thing, read the top of chapters 1-4 (do you people read these? I do, but people tend to find me odd so I don't know).  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or any of the other characters. I do own any OCs you see popping up in the story. I do own the plot, but it's really not saying much (sorry, I get depressed when I get sick).  
  
When the hell did it get that I had to put up so much shit before I start a chapter? Um, spoiler for Book 4, but you all probably read that already, so it's not really a spoiler. I want to thank y'all for being so patient. I didn't use the exact wording from the 4th book, but you should get the general idea of what's happening. Reason? I'm too lazy to get out the book and look it up *coughs and downs more cough syrup*. And now, on with the 5th (and really crappy) chapter. Uh, enjoy?  
  
Chapter 5  
  
The next month passed slowly in Harry's opinion. There was nothing to do during the day but eat, sleep, go to class, and do homework. The weather was becoming increasingly colder. Harry was becoming a little more bitter everyday. At the very first Defense Against the Dark Arts class, Harry had finally discovered who the new teacher was. Professor Kaz Smith was a 25 year old woman who had moved from America to Britain to attend Hogwarts after she had received her letter when she was 11 years old. Her auburn hair fell down to her mid back and she was clad not in the traditional black robes, but flare jeans and long sleeve shirts. She was not the most cheery person in the world. In fact, most of her lessons were down right morbid. Harry liked her in an instant.  
  
September faded slowly away, bringing on a cold and dreary October. Harry kept to himself most of the time, always reading muggle books or staring off into space. Ron failed to notice Harry's worsening condition, though he was still concerned. Hermione was practically frantic, even if she didn't show it. She had picked up one of Harry's books, bored one night in the commonroom, and was shocked at what she had found. It contained nothing but abuse, rape, self mutilation, and suicide. She picked up the book that had been next to it, and found the same thing. With this evidence and her talk with Draco, she began to pick up the subtle changes in Harry. He was paler than before, now almost ghostly white. He had thinned out, and now you could see his bones sticking out through the skin. He hardly ever ate, skipping breakfast each morning, protesting he was to tired to go to dinner, and eating small portions at lunch. His eyes had lost that sparkle, now being dull and emotionless. Everything about him, from his expression to his posture, screamed he was wasting away. Not only that, but Harry had bandages all up his right arm. Hermione saw it during one of their Care of Magical Creatures, when they had had to roll up their sleeves to dig in the dirt. Hermione had looked up from her Beezle, which was quickly going into hibernation, to see the white bandages sticking out like a beacon.  
  
She had also seen Draco looking at the bandages too. His concern for Harry had grown throughout the month, and was frequently sending letters to Hermione at breakfast, signing them with a simple 'D'. They had conversed several times in the dead of night up in the Astronomy Tower, and were no closer to finding a solution then when they started. Hermione told him everything she had seen inside the commonroom, when he wasn't around the general public of the school. It was getting worse quickly.  
  
One night in mid-October, Harry had actually gone to bed early, his lack of sleep finally catching up on him. He hated sleeping with a passion. He never went to sleep unless it was absolutely necessary. He was constantly haunted by dreams and memories of his past. So cold, so real, he would wake up screaming and shaking uncontrollably. He would then lay there, clutching his sheets in a futile attempt at comfort, and think about the dream over and over. This night was no different.  
  
//There he is. He is standing there right in front of Harry, breathing heavily and looking uncertain. He slants a look at the goblet, then back at Harry. Cedric. Alive, and in the maze that would ultimately be the last thing he would see of the Hogwarts grounds. He looks so noble, his stature the image of a true hero. So unlike Harry, who was sitting on the ground clutching his leg. ::Damn spider:: Harry thinks to himself, ::gods, Cedric. You're alive::  
  
"You take it," Harry hears himself say, "you got there first. You one it fairly."  
  
"You told me about the dragons," Cedric mumbles.  
  
"So, you told me about the egg. We're square," Harry argues.  
  
"I got help with the egg," Cedric insists.  
  
"We're still square," Harry says. He has the urge to scream at Cedric to leave, but he can't seem to get the words out. No, he has to sit there and watch his rival die at his hands.  
  
They continue to argue over who will take the cup for several minutes. Inside, Harry's mind is screaming at Cedric to run. It's no use. Here Harry was, arguing with Cedric, and there was nothing to prevent his death. It was agonizing to watch.  
  
"On three. Ready? One, two, three."  
  
And they were off. Off to Cedric's death. If he could, Harry would have sobbed. He was watching the events through his own eyes. Even though it was a dream, it still hurt badly that he could do nothing to prevent what would happen. It was bad enough he had gone through this once, and now he had to relive it again.  
  
They hit the ground, and Harry knows it will all be over soon. Inside he was experiencing mixed emotions. Regret, guilt, anger, sadness, pain, all surging through his veins. He had lost a part of himself that night, would he lose another after the dream?  
  
A flash of green light burst through the darkness and Harry steeled himself for what he would next see. He opened his eyes to see Cedric, spread eagle and eyes open, dead. At this point, all his barriers broke and he sobbed out loud. He cried, and waited for Wormtail to come and bound and gag him. It never happened. 5 minutes passed, then 10, each second lasting an eternity.  
  
Suddenly, he heard voices around him. He recognized some of them to be Hermione, Ron, Dumbledore, and a few others. They were whispering, their words unintelligible to Harry's ears. One voice rose above the rest, almost shouting.  
  
"You killed him! You killed Cedric! How could you?!"  
  
"It's not my fault!" Harry protested, wishing he could believe his own words.  
  
"Of course it's your fault! You bastard! All you bring is death, you should be sorry for what you've done!"  
  
"But I am! More than anything!" Harry cried out, "Please believe me!"  
  
There was no reply. Harry looked around wildly, trying to figure out a way to end this horrible nightmare. He did the only thing he could think of. He ran. He ran into the darkness, not caring where it lead as long as he could get away from the dead he was responsible for. He closed his eyes and concentrated on pumping his legs harder. When he finally stopped and opened his eyes, he was surprised to find himself in a mansion. Stone crept up to the ceiling, and the walls were covered with book shelves. Harry scanned the room, and his eyes settled on the figure sitting in an armchair. It was Draco.  
  
"Draco! Oh thank god!" Harry yelled, rushing forward.  
  
He didn't get very far. Hands grabbed him from behind and started to drag him in the opposite direction. He cried out, but Draco never turned his head. Darkness engulfed Harry and he woke with a start.  
  
Sweat drenched from his forehead and mingled with the tears that were falling. Crying. He seemed to be doing that a lot lately. He took a minute to calm his breathing, and looked at his watch. 2am. Hm, Kaz should still be up. Harry got up quickly, not bothering to change from his pajamas, and grabbed his invisibility cloak.  
  
Professor Smith had become fast friends with Harry. She even allowed him to call her Kaz, but only in private. She didn't believe in pressuring Harry, but to just let him talk on his own. That was part of the reason he trusted her so much. He swept quickly down the halls to the door of her room and whispered the password, given to him by Kaz, to the painting of a very sleepy man in a black cape.  
  
"Kaz?" he called as he entered the living room.  
  
Kaz looked up from her book and her eyes went wide. Harry's face was a mess. The remains of tears streaked his cheeks, his eyes were puffy, and his hair was matted with sweat. She quickly set down her book and stood up, opening her arms. Harry rushed forward and hugged her tightly. Tears threatened to spill, and he let them flow. Kaz just stood there silently, hugging Harry with one arm and the other stroking his hair. After a while, they sat on the couch and Kaz waited for him to explain. And he did. He told her everything of the dream, his eyes kept glued to his hands in his lap. Kaz listened patiently, pulling her hair back into a ponytail and grabbing a few tissues. Harry used them all and hugged Kaz again, staining her blue cotton pajamas with salty tears.  
  
"Harry," Kaz's voice was soft and comforting, "It's okay. It was only a dream. Come here, it'll be okay."  
  
She enveloped him in her arms, rocking him lightly back and forth until he was calm. Half an hour later, they agreed that Harry needed to get back to bed. He nodded, and hugged her one more time before he left. As the portrait hole closed silently behind him, Kaz sighed mournfully.  
  
"Oh Harry. I pray everything will turn out okay. Lord knows you need a little relief in your life. Maybe I should talk to Ms. Granger. Or maybe even Mr. Malfoy? I've seen the looks he gives you. I'm praying for you Harry. Praying with all my heart," she mumbled to him.  
  
~~~~~*  
  
Six: Thank you for bearing the wait of this chapter. Hopefully it didn't turn out too bad. Like I said before, I hate writing filler chapters (in- between, which ever term). And the fact that I'm sick don't help. To help me out with the chapters ahead, I've been able to accuire myself a temporary new muse! Everyone say hi to Lee-chan!  
  
Lee-chan: Hello! I'm here to help Six out, I'll do my best! Hey? How about a DBZ yaoi fic?  
  
Six: *bops Lee-chan on head* Lee-chan! No! We've got this fic to do!  
  
Lee-chan: Darn.  
  
Six: Anyhow, I'll try and get the next chapter out as soon as possible. And if Lee-chan does her job correctly, it'll come out great. *gives readers various gifts to compensate* Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go fall into bed and sleep. Wish me luck, bye!  
  
Lee-chan: *waves* 


	6. Chapter 6

WAI! I'm back with another chapter of GSEE! I'm so happy I got over my writer's block (with a little help from my muse)! I posted another mini- fic the other day, Letters to the Lover, please take some time and read it! I'm not sick anymore, which is a good thing, seeing as I hate getting sick (for obvious reasons).  
  
Replies to certain reviews: Dorothy S - thanks for reviewing, I love your story. I think I went a little overboard with my last review *sweatdrop* Shinigami - Those bands are heavy American rock bands. I love Savage Garden too *drools at thought of Darren Hayes*. The people I'm talking about are the main focus of this chapter, I hope you like! MissMoppet - Yes, I know, I know. I was looking for some bands to put in, and my friends suggested them, and since I was clueless I used them. I don't particularly like them, but I needed something. Hell yeah Harry listens to Bright Eyes, they're the best! I'm addicted to their music Snuffy5- Woah, CALM DOWN! There is no need to choke the author, if you did there would be no new chapters! But, I'm glad you like it. You should be happy now. So, try not to choke me anymore, okay?  
  
Read beginning of other chapters for key.  
  
Warnings: Oh dear...Draco gets in to torture. It made me queasy just writing it.  
  
And before I forget: *gives all readers and reviewers roses and chocolates and stuff* YOU GUYS ARE THE BEST!!!!  
  
~*  
  
"Draco, who exactly were the people you told me about the first time we met here, the ones that killed themselves?" Hermione asked suddenly.  
  
Draco stiffened visibly. They were in the Astronomy Tower, meeting like they had over the past month and a half. They had talked about many things, but always refrained from mentioning these kinds of topics. Draco drew in a shallow breath, and looked sharply at Hermione.  
  
"Are you sure you want me to tell you? If you do, I must warn you, it won't be pretty," Draco said seriously.  
  
Hermione looked shocked at Draco's reaction, but nodded and said quietly, "Tell me."  
  
Draco again drew in a breath, but this time looked out the window. His eyes went far off, as if he was trying to remember the events.  
  
"There were two specific instances I can remember," he began, "A man, maybe 25 or so, and a 16 year old girl. The girl, whose name was Tara, came to the castle over the most recent summer vacation. All the captives were held at my mansion. Why, I have no idea. She was quite pretty, with long blonde hair and sparkling brown eyes. If I wasn't gay I might have taken a fancy to her. But that's not the point. Her family was a pureblood, and one of her brothers was in You-Know-Who's ranks. The other members of the family had stayed neutral, except for her. She went to Beauxbaton, but had come to visit her parents for the summer. She was secretly working with Madame Maxime to help destroy the Death Eaters, but her brother found out. That's when they came and took her up to the castle. She stayed there for 3 days before they did anything. At night I would go down and visit her, knowing none of the servants or house elves would tell. She told me about herself and the story of her life. How her Death Eater brother was always threatening the family if they turned over to the opposing side. How he would slap her around if she argued with him. How she had to sit there when other Death Eaters came over for dinner, racked with anxiety that they would find out about her. On the 4th day, they started to torture her. I watched it from a secret passage. There was one located to every cell, and all I had to do was open it a crack to see exactly what they were doing. This wasn't regular torture either. Yes, they cast curses on her that broke her badly. Many of them. But that was not the worst part. When dusk came, the real torture began. I would visit her to give her some water, and I would have to scramble back to the passage because I heard footsteps. One would come down, lock the cell door and cover the little window, and they would.they would.rape her."  
  
Hermione interrupted his story with a loud gasp. Draco tore his eyes from the window to her, and he found she had grown pale. She had shrunk a little, wrapping her arms around herself. Draco looked out the window, knowing he could not be able to continue if he looked at her. He hated thinking of all of those nights in the dungeons, but nonetheless, he continued on.  
  
"It happened every night. The first time, I looked on, horrified by what I saw. They would use her, then beat her, then use her again. It continued like that for hours. When they would finally leave, she would lay huddled up in the corner, covered in blood and God knows how many other things. After the first night, I would bring down a bowl of water with me, and when they leave enter the cell and clean her up. I would clean the blood, dress her, hold her, and let her cry on me for a while. She would tell me of her fears, of the thoughts she experienced while they abused her. She told me how she wanted to end it all. I couldn't blame her really. After about a week, they started coming up with more.creative ideas. They were some things not even your mind could fathom. They were crude, disgusting and downright inhumane. 2 and a half weeks later, she finally snapped. It was after some particularly nasty episode. I was about to come in when I saw the mad glint in her eye. She took the rusted chain that bound her feet and cut her wrists. As she bled, she looked over at the stone wall. That's when she went truly insane. She hopped over to the wall and started bashing her head against the stone. She did that for at least 15 minutes before she fell unconscious. I scrambled in there, determined to keep her alive. I did, for a while. She finally regained consciousness and told me to leave her be. That it was her time to depart from the world and that she valued all that I had given her. I can openly tell you that I have never, and probably never will, cried that hard or that long in my life," he finished in a soft voice.  
  
"A-and what about the man?" Hermione squeaked, her voice failing her.  
  
Draco's eyes flashed with bitterness. Hermione shuddered; the look in his eyes was pure ice. He seemed oddly calm, and Hermione had a feeling she wasn't going to like this story much. But she refused to not hear the tale. It would not only help her on understand what Harry might be going through, but it would also help her understand what the Death Eaters were like besides the facts she already knew.  
  
"The man, his name was Tei. His mother was Japanese, and had somehow convinced her husband to name their child that. Tei's story is slightly similar to Harry's, but only in the beginning really. His parents had been killed by a dark wizard when he was one year old, but he had been at a friend of his parents' house that night. Many of the people wanted to take him in, but he was sent to live with distant muggle relatives. These muggles didn't disapprove of magic persay, they just never told him he was a wizard. They would beat him, his cousin using him as a punching bad and his uncle the tool to take his drunken rage out on. His aunt, however, was a great woman. She was related to Tei's father, and the two were very close. She was too scared to stand up to her violent son and husband, but she would help out Tei in anyway she could. She would sneak him food in the middle of the night, wash his bloodstained clothes, and generally give him someone to hold and love. She unfortunately passed away from breast cancer when he was 8. His relatives considered putting him up for adoption, but they decided against it, thinking it would be a little suspicious that a boy be dumped at 8 years old. At 11 years old, he went off to study magic. I never found out which school he went to, but he had a lot of potential. That's the main reason You-Know-Who wanted him to join the Death Eaters. He was taken when he was about 23, and we were on vacation before our third year. They tried to convince him to become one of them, but he wouldn't do it. No matter how hard they persuaded him, he wouldn't comply. They were patient at first, or, as patient as servants to the DarkLord could get. After about 3 week, they got angry. They were fed up with trying to be nice, so they tried to persuade him by other means. They cursed him, beat him, tortured him, and so many other things. His screams echoed throughout the castle all night and most of the day. The other Death Eaters said they were showing him how powerful and wonderful they were. Father said they were doing it because they were pissed off because they weren't as superior as they put out. Nevertheless, they continued the torture. Father had always said the DarkLord was horrible, not in public I might add, but that summer I really got an understanding of what he meant. They broke bones, mended them magically, then broke them again. They expected him to give up and join, or just die. They didn't know how much endurance he had. It amazed me really. When I came back the summer before fourth year, he was still there. I don't know why they didn't just use the killing curse on him. Father said it's because he was too valuable. I shrugged it off, having more important things to worry about. Like the DarkLord's growing interest in me. I managed to evade him that summer, and went off to school. I came home, and he was still there! It was beyond me how he had ever managed to survive, yet he was still there. Father finally decided to end his misery. He staged a loud conversation with my mother about how the boy was nothing but a nuisance and that they could do better. The other Death Eaters came to their senses and performed the killing curse a few days before Tara came. I made a makeshift grave with my mother out in the garden, and every week after his death we'd place a flower there. It was in secret of course, though I suspected Father had to use a Memory Charm here and there. So, there you have it. You wanted to know, I told you."  
  
"Draco, I'm so s-" Hermione began.  
  
"Don't be sorry," Draco cut her off a little coldly, then softened, "It was best that they both died. No one should ever be subjected to that kind of torture. Especially not Tei and Tara. They were the best kind of people out there. I really miss Tara, and every night I remember to pray for her soul."  
  
Hermione smiled sadly, and her eyes suddenly brightened. A plan began to form in her head, one she knew would cheer Draco up.  
  
"Draco, what was Tara's last name?" she asked absently.  
  
"D'Souer. Why?" Draco asked puzzled.  
  
"Just wondering. We need to get going, it's really late," Hermione said quickly, making a mental note of the name. Draco checked his watch.  
  
"Shit! It's 2:30! I need to get back to my dorm, I told Blaise I would be going out and be back before 3!" Draco said anxiously.  
  
With a swish of his cloak he took off down the stairs. Sure, he had half an hour, but it would be better to get back sooner rather then later. As he snuck down the Charms corridor, he heard a soft sort of sniffing sound. A muffled sob reached his ears next and he stopped. He looked around wearily, and he stepped quietly to where the sound originated from. He came to a window. It appeared to be empty, yet the sniffing continued to come from there. Draco wracked his brain, trying to think what it might be. After a moment, the answer came to him.  
  
"Potter?" he called out softly.  
  
The sound of a sharp breath being sucked in came next. Silence came, and Draco looked up at the window nervously. He gathered his courage and spoke again.  
  
"It's okay. It's just me Draco," he ventured, using his first name uncertainly, "I'm not going to go tell anyone you're here."  
  
More silence followed, and Draco waited tensely. After a moment, he saw Harry's head appear, then the rest of his body. He had pulled off his Invisibility Cloak, and was sitting, apparently having been looking out the window.  
  
"W-what are you doing here?" Harry whispered shakily, "How did you know I was here?"  
  
"I heard something sniffing from the end of the corridor, and I came to inspect," was Draco's reply, "What are you doing here?"  
  
"Thinking." A short, efficient reply. But not good enough for Draco.  
  
"About what?" he asked.  
  
"None of your fucking business!" Harry snapped defensively.  
  
Draco noted that Harry's eyes were red and puffy, no doubt from the crying he had done. Hesitating slightly, he climbed up next to Harry on the window. It was tall and not very high up, with a slight ledge that was perfect for sitting. Draco propped himself up parallel to Harry and looked the other boy straight in the eye.  
  
"You don't look so good, are you okay?" Draco asked calmly.  
  
"I'm. Fine." Harry said, swiping at his eyes angrily.  
  
"Why were you crying? Is something bothering you?" Draco continued.  
  
"I was not crying, and nothing is bothering me. Sod off Malfoy," Harry growled.  
  
"You can tell me, you know," Draco said.  
  
"Yeah, right," the other boy said sarcastically.  
  
"Seriously. I'm here to listen. I would understand," Draco said quietly.  
  
Harry looked at Draco with a fiery look in his eyes. He was angry. Very angry. How dare he!  
  
"Oh really," Harry seethed, "You think you could understand? You with your Death Eater father and smarmy I'm-better-than-everyone-else ways," forget about love right now, Harry was pissed and didn't care what insults he gave, "Tell me something, Draco Malfoy. Have you ever, ever ONCE in your life, lost something precious to you? Something that was even remotely special to you? Don't say you can understand me until you can prove it!"  
  
Draco looked away. ::No, don't cry!:: his mind yelled. Memories of Tara came flooding back to him, and tears threatened to come out. He pushed them back. He looked at Harry with a mixture of emotions in his eyes.  
  
"Oh, I can prove it. Don't you dare pull that stunt about my father with me. You shouldn't judge people just because of something that might be. And don't you dare ask me that question ever again. I've had just as many important loses as you have. I understand you better then the rest of the school ever will, and maybe even better than yourself!" Draco said with hints of anger, hurt, and sadness in his voice.  
  
Harry looked at the boy in front of him, shock in his features. He hadn't quite expected that reaction from his one-time enemy. He let his eyes scan Draco suspiciously at first, and then with a kind of acceptance. Draco saw it in Harry's eyes and gave a smile. They sat in silence for a while, and then Harry spoke.  
  
"Who were they?" he asked, not a hint of curiosity in his voice.  
  
"She," he put emphasis on the word, "was probably the only friend I ever had. She told me her story, I told her mine. She taught me that death wasn't as scary as I thought, and that sometimes it's better than living in a world where all you get it used and abused. She gave me a new light on certain things. He," again with emphasis, "taught me bravery and the courage to stand up for what you believe in. He taught me to endure as much as you could, and if you don't want to do something, resist as much as you can. No matter what it gets you. They were both great people, and they both died while at the same time giving me parts of my life."  
  
Harry gave Draco a thoughtful look, then nodded. Draco gave a silent sigh of relief. He had gained Harry's acceptance and maybe even friendship. He decided to find out.  
  
"Harry?" he asked uncertainly.  
  
Harry gave a small start at hearing his first name, but recovered and gave a small, "Hm?"  
  
"Do...do you think we could be friends? I...I would like it a lot if we were. Will you be my friend?" Draco stammered out.  
  
Harry stared. Friends? Only friends? But oh, he wanted to be so much more. He guessed he could just settle for friendship. It was a step in the right path, and maybe they could grow into more.  
  
"I would like that too," he said softly.  
  
For the first time in a long while, Draco smiled. Not a smirk, nor a tug at his lips. A full-blown smile. Harry gazed at him. The moonlight hit Draco at an angle, platinum hair shimmering slightly, and casting shadows on the boy's face. Harry had never seen beauty quite like this.  
  
"Harry? Harry, are you okay?" Draco asked with concern, seeing the far away look on the emerald-eyed boy's face.  
  
"I am now," Harry whispered softly, but not soft enough that Draco didn't hear.  
  
They sat in silence for a while, each content in their own thoughts. Harry was smiling, a sight that pleased Draco greatly. Harry yawned and began to drift off to sleep. Soon enough, he was fast asleep and looking like he was not about to wake up anytime soon. Draco wondered what he should do; he certainly couldn't leave Harry here. Teachers were still roaming the castle. Sighing slightly, he scooped Harry into his arms and slipped off the ledge. He remembered Hermione telling him how to get to the Gryffindor commonroom, just in case something ever happened that needed her attention. He walked quickly but softly, balancing Harry and the boy's Invisibility Cloak in his arms. He reached the Fat Lady, who was asleep. He called out to her softly. She shook awake and looked down at the boy strangely.  
  
"And who might you be?" she asked, annoyed that an unknown student had waken her up at 3 in the morning.  
  
"I'm...I'm a friend of Harry's," he nodded to the sleeping boy in his arms, "I know I don't have the password, but can you let me for 2 seconds? I can't leave him out here, and I promise I won't do anything to cause trouble," Draco answered.  
  
The painting considered not letting him in, but caved when she saw the desperate look on the young boy's face. She sighed, defeated.  
  
"All right, go on in. But, only go in and then out. No trouble, you hear?" she said, swinging forward.  
  
"I promise," was the reply as Draco crawled through the portrait hole.  
  
He traveled down and found the commonroom. It was cozy, with many squishy armchairs and a couch or two in the corner. All that was left of the fire was a few burning coals, but it was still enough light to see. It was empty, all of the students having gone to bed. Draco smiled in relief. It would have been mayhem if he had walked down and someone had seen him carrying his supposed enemy. He was also surprised that Harry had managed to stay asleep throughout the entire trip. Not daring to go up one of the staircases, he gently laid Harry down into one of the armchairs. He placed a book from one of the nearby tables into the other's lap. That was in case someone came down and wondered what Harry was doing down here instead of in the dorms. He watched the sleeping boy for a moment, memorizing his features. Draco brushed a loose strand of jet-black hair from Harry's face with a slightly shaky hand. Looking around, he stooped down and placed a soft, gentle kiss on Harry's lips. The boy only stirred and repositioned himself, mumbling incoherent words. Blushing fiercely, Draco straightened and rushed out of the commonroom. As the portrait hole closed, he turned to the Fat Lady, still quite red.  
  
"Um...thank you," he stuttered. Thank you's had never been his thing.  
  
"No problem child. You better get back to your own dorm, it's very late," she said, grinning.  
  
He nodded furiously and took off. The Fat Lady watched him retreat, the grin as wide as ever. She had noticed his blush. It wasn't that hard really; his face was as red as a tomato. She giggled to herself.  
  
"Those two would make a cute couple," she said to herself, dissolving into giggles.  
  
~* Six: Well, there you have it. Chapter 6 is complete. I think it came out very well, don't you? I want to thank Lee-chan for being my wonderful muse and helping me come up with Draco's stories!  
  
Lee-chan: You're welcome. It wasn't that hard, when you're as great as me *flips long brown hair*  
  
Draco: Now now, there's no need to get egotistical. There are still other chapters to write you now.  
  
Lee-chan: Oh yeah? Look who's talking, mister 'I'm-better-than-everyone- else'. I bet you loved it when you got to k-  
  
Draco: *covers Lee-chan's mouth as Harry walks in, his face red* Uh, hey Harry!  
  
Six: *giggles*  
  
Harry: Did I miss something?  
  
Six: Those two are just conversing *giggle*. Anywho, all of you people out there, remember to review! I'll keep working on my story if you review! I should get going now, see you! 


	7. Author's Note

Chibi slasher here:  
  
  
  
Quick note for the 6th chapter.  
  
If you are confused about Tei and Tara's stories, I'll give you a little clarification.  
  
Tara – Tara's story is there to represent the fact that a person can go insane after endless amounts of physical and mental torture. The difference between Tara's condition and Harry's is really irrelevant. The main point is that if you are put through enough mental and physical stress, you can snap.  
  
Tei – Tei's story might be a little more difficult to figure out. First of all, I know Tei didn't kill himself. That part was my fault. It took on a life of it's own and it came out totally different than what I planned. I guess the point of Draco telling Tei's story is that the Death Eater's are persistent bastards who will use any means to get what they want. This means they will continue to attack Harry until he's dead. This combined with Harry's already fragile state will push him closer to the edge. That and Tei's past was similar (in some ways) to Harry's, and thus reminded Draco of it. Yes, Tei's story does have significance, it's just hard to find.  
  
I'm sorry for any confusion due to the stories. I just realized it about 2 hours after I posted the chapter, and maybe this author's note will help you understand why Draco even told these stories. That's all for now kiddies, see you soon! 


	8. Chapter 7

TADA!! I'M BACK!! Like I promised, here's chapter 7! It's been one LOOONG, tiring week, but I managed to make it! I feel so proud of myself! Now, if only I could work this hard on my homework... *sweatdrops*  
  
To those special reviewers:  
  
GoddessGryffindor - Oh my, thank you so much! That is such a compliment, and made me so much better!!  
  
the very evil bunny - I feel for you girl. My muse never gives me any ideas, she just loves to watch the Young and the Restless (Lee-chan: I can't help it if I want to see what happens to Mackenzie!)  
  
AphonyAdversity - *blush* Oh stop! You're embarrasing me! What's scary is that I can actually picture you doing an anime cheerleader style cheer. I thought it was hilarious how you stumbled upon my story and then just happened to tell me about it online!  
  
To all my other wonderful reviewers: *gives roses and chocolates and other stuff* you know the drill. You also know the key by now, so I won't get into that.  
  
PLEASE READ THE NOTES AT THE BOTTOM. It contains VERY important stuff. But...not without reading the chapter first *big grin*  
  
Well, I won't keep you any longer, seeing is how I'm late enough as it is. Go on.read!  
  
~*GSEE Chapter 7  
  
Another month passed, in some ways loudly, in others silently. Harry started to become two different people. To other people, he seemed to be getting better, eating more and becoming a tiny more active amongst the others. Draco, on the other hand, knew different. He spent many nights with Harry, talking and relishing in the company of his new found friend and long time crush. There was a lot more to the other boy than he had realized. In the beginning, all Harry had ever been to Draco was an obstacle, only there to stop him on his way to glory. Now, he knew different. There were fears, dreams, longings and hopes, though the last was becoming smaller by the day. Harry told him things that no one else knew, and many times there were tears and the comfort of friendship. Still, Draco could sense there were a lot of things Harry wasn't telling him. Whenever they strayed to a specific topic, Harry's eyes seemed to dull and close off. He became flat and almost cold, changing the topic as quickly as it was introduced. No matter how much he tried, Draco was not getting very far. Even though it had only been a month, Harry had scared Draco far to many times. The cold of November was bitter, and Harry had a tendency to stand out there, his eyes unseeing and ghostlike, for long periods of times. One night when Draco was approaching Harry, he thought he saw a glint of light, like it was being reflected off a surface. He saw an object sticking out of Harry's pocket, gold in color and just a hint of what looked like a sapphire.  
  
It was a beautiful mid-November afternoon, the sky a dull gray and snow drifting lightly across the grounds. They were in Care for Magical Creatures, and they were studying Grundions, creatures that dove into the snow to find frozen plants to eat. Draco breathed in the smell of newly fallen snow, and removed a glove to run his fingers through the white powder. He loved snow. He always had, ever since he was a baby. During the winter he would spend hours outside with his mother, making snow angels and snow men. He once had a snowball fight with his father, one of the more surprising and best moments of his life. He closed his eyes, inhaling the crisp air, lost in thought. He smiled genuinely, thinking of that one day where his family had actually been a family without having to worry about the Death Eaters.  
  
"Draco?" a soft voice asked from his right.  
  
He opened an eye, his smile not fading, and saw Harry looking at him in awe. His smile grew slightly. Harry could recall only one instance where Draco had really smiled, and it was captivating. He felt an urge to smile himself, and did. He felt the warmth rush to his cold cheeks, tingeing them a darker shade of pink then they already were. Draco chuckled softly to himself at the sight. He had woken up today thinking it was just one of those days where everything would turn out wrong, but yet again, time had proven him wrong. He turned his focus back onto the class, and looked down to see his grundion, a beautiful blue female, chewing on a bunch of roots and staring curiously at him. He reached down and patted its furry head and it nibbled softly on one of his fingers. He laughed quietly, partly because it tickled, and partly because she was extremely cute. He wondered suddenly if he could keep her as a pet. He would have to ask Hagrid later, when no one was around. He turned his head and watched Harry play with his own. It was a yellow male, and was attacking Harry's hair playfully from its position on the Gryffindor's shoulder. Harry laughed and pulled a strand of unruly black hair from the creature's mouth. He then proceeded to tuck it behind his ear and tickle the grundion with his fingers, which replied with a funny squealing sound. The other students were waiting for their grundions to appear from under the snow, not really paying attention to the two boys. Well, except for Hermione. She gave Draco a weary glance, motioning her head towards Harry.  
  
'Talk to him!' she mouthed.  
  
'I can't do that!' he mouthed back.  
  
She gave him a questioning look, and he shook furiously his head in return. She sighed and shrugged her shoulders, giving up and picking up her pink grundion that had just popped out from under the snow at her feat. Draco stuck out his tongue and returned to watching the grundion in his palms.  
  
"Hey, you're a cute little thing, aren't you girl," he whispered to it.  
  
She seemed to understand him and gave a squeak in response. She lifted her chin a little higher, the compliment boosting her ego. He smirked.  
  
"Your grundion is a lot like you," a deep voice said, this time from his left.  
  
Draco turned to see Blaise Zambini standing there, his grundion on the top of his head. They wore the same expression, an evil smirk with shining eyes. Draco rolled his eyes.  
  
"Please Zambini, as if you knew anything about either of us," Draco scoffed.  
  
"Oh, I think I do. Very well in fact," Blaise replied.  
  
"Don't go jumping to conclusions so quickly. When in all 5 years that we've been here have you ever tried to get to know me?" Draco growled.  
  
"What do you think I'm doing right now?" Blaise whispered in Draco's ear, almost like a purr.  
  
"I'd say you were trying to piss me off. And you're doing a bloody good job too," Draco said coldly, pushing Blaise away slightly, who laughed.  
  
"Oh come off it Draco, I'm just kidding around," Blaise said jokingly.  
  
"I hate you," was the reply.  
  
"No you don't."  
  
"Yes I do."  
  
"No you don't"  
  
"Yes. I. Do."  
  
"You can't hate me."  
  
"You want to bet?" Draco said angrily, turning and walking away to a different area.  
  
Blaise quirked an eyebrow, but though nothing of it and turned back to the other Slytherins. Draco headed over to a solitary area near the forest and sat down, despite the few inches of snow beneath him. He observed the class and the different groups that had split. The other Slytherins had formed a large circle near the cabin and were joking. Dean and Seamus were talking with Lavender and Parvati, who were at the same time giggling at their grundions. The 'Dream Team' was standing farthest away from everyone else and were chatting happily. Draco sighed when he saw Harry laugh. God, his laughs were so rare these days. Draco longed to hear the melodious sound fill his ears, but shook himself. Now was not the time to be day dreaming. He stood up, brushed the snow from his cloak, and began to wander around, his grundion contently perched on his shoulder. The lesson seemed to drag on for an eternity, but it did give him a chance to soak in the beauty of the grounds without having to worry. Out of the corner of his eye, he suddenly saw two figures walk up the path to the front doors of the castle, both shrouded in cloaks. One of them stopped and turned onto the grounds, straight to Hagrid. They whispered for a moment, and Hagrid looked over at Draco. He signaled the Slytherin to come over, who quickly complied with mild curiosity. The figure in the cloak looked down upon Draco, who sputtered when he saw the face of his father staring back at him.  
  
"Father? What are you doing here?!" Draco whispered incredulously.  
  
The older Malfoy did not reply, only gave his son a silencing look that said 'We'll talk later'. Draco nodded and watched as his father continued his walk along the path. He turned back to the grounds, and saw Hermione sending him a strange look. He just shrugged casually, and returned to playing with his grundion.  
  
~*  
  
Harry was almost starting to enjoy dinnertime again. Well, almost. Sure, he got to talk to his friends and everything, but it was hard when you have an 11-year-old girl hanging off your arm like some kind of freakish attachment. That's right, Lucidia was still at it. He had gotten tipped off by some of her yearmates that her motto was, 'If you don't give up, you get what you want', and Harry was one thing she definitely wanted. He sighed, looking down at the fuzzy black head on his elbow. He had lost count of how many times she had asked him for the butter. Honestly, the girl was going to give herself a heart attack if she kept it up! His two friends were so wrapped up in a conversation with Dean that they failed to notice. He sighed quietly to himself and let his eyes travel to the Slytherin table. Draco sat at the far end of the table, looking a little nervous. He was glancing at the High Table, and more importantly, at Dumbledore. Eh? That was a little strange. After watching the gray-eyed boy for a while, their eyes finally made contact. Draco gave Harry a small, reassuring smile. He did that a lot, when no one was looking. Harry would have smiled back, if Lucidia hadn't tugged on his robes, asking for.you guessed it, the butter. When he turned back, he found Draco scowling at the young girl, but let it go quickly when he found Harry looking at him. Their staring contest was interrupted when someone shook Harry on the shoulder. He felt Lucidia let go of his arm instantly, and he turned his head to thank who ever it was quietly. He jumped slightly when he saw Professor McGonagall standing there.  
  
"Mr. Potter, are you all right? I've been trying to get your attention for a while," she said in a slightly motherly tone, soft enough so only he could hear.  
  
"I'm fine Professor, I was just...thinking. Anyway, what is it?" he reassured.  
  
"The Headmaster requests your presence tonight in his office at 10. 'The Phoenix is landing'," she said, still softly.  
  
Harry just nodded his head and she moved away. He understood what she had said. She meant that the Order of the Phoenix was meeting that night. He thought the name of the organization and codes they used were a bit cliché, but he was dedicated to it nonetheless. Hell, he had to be. He was 'Wonderboy'. His expression flashed with bitterness for a moment, but he quickly covered it up. Now was not the time to go giving himself away. He finished his meal in silence, thinking deeply and not noticing when Lucidia leeched onto him again. He didn't notice McGonagall approach Draco and whisper to the blonde boy, and he didn't notice the looks Draco gave him for the rest of the night.  
  
~*  
  
Ten o'clock rolled around quickly, and soon enough Harry was walking noiselessly down the hall. He knew Filch was watching him from the shadows. Apparently he had been clued in about the meeting and did not approach Harry. But he showed himself now and then just to proved that if Harry went astray, there would be hell to pay. Harry turned and smiled largely at the shadows, and chuckled quietly when he heard stumbling and a faint 'oph!'. Reaching the stone gargoyle, he said various passwords. The Hogwarts teachers were great at passing on information, but were sometimes skimpy on the specifics. He growled in frustration, but jumped when he heard a voice speak behind him.  
  
"Jelly Belly."  
  
Harry turned around, smiling slightly. He knew the voice was Draco's, and he greeted the Slytherin with a wave. Draco just smirked in return. The gargoyle jumped aside and the boys started to descend the staircase.  
  
"They didn't tell you?" Draco asked.  
  
"It's not my fault. I was just trying to eat dinner when McGonagall told me. It's their job to tell me how to get into the damn meeting. Of course, they always forget something," Harry replied.  
  
"Oh? Care to give an example?" Draco said curiously.  
  
"A couple meetings ago it was apparently my turn to bring some kind of dessert. But as always, they forgot to tell me. I nearly had to fly out of Dumbledore's office. They were so pissed off," Harry shook his head.  
  
Draco snorted and said, "That really doesn't surprise me."  
  
"So how are things going with your dad?" Harry asked quietly.  
  
Draco's face grew grave, "No so good. I think they're starting to suspect him," he stopped at the door and put a hand on Harry's arm, signaling him to stay, "I'm getting worried. Father has been to several of their meetings. He's found out some things that are going to be discussed at this meeting tonight. Are you sure you're okay?"  
  
Harry gave him a quizzical look when he heard the concern in other boy's voice.  
  
"Draco, I'll be fine. Why would I be in anyway not okay?" Harry said.  
  
::You just wait and see. I just hope you don't try anything stupid:: Draco thought.  
  
Draco just shook his head, and they entered. Over in the corner, Draco saw his father talking to a fellow member. Harry went straight to Remus Lupin, giving him a big hug and striking up a conversation. Draco looked around, spotted Dumbledore, and went over.  
  
"Sir?" he asked.  
  
"Ah, Mr. Malfoy. So glad you could make it tonight. What can I do for you?" the old man replied kindly.  
  
"Sir, I talked to my father when my lessons ended, and he told me a few things. Do you think it's really.appropriate to say these kinds of things in front of Harry?" Draco asked uncomfortably.  
  
"Now why would you say something like that? I would think he would be proud," Dumbledore said.  
  
"You do know that Harry has been having a few problems, right?" Draco said nervously.  
  
"I am aware, I assure you," Dumbledore said, a different light shining in his eyes.  
  
::Then apparently you don't know Harry as well as you think you do, or you would be trying to help:: Draco thought wearily, but left the subject alone. He would just have to deal with things as they come.  
  
"If I may have your attention please," Dumbledore said over the noise, which quickly died down, "I'm grateful that everyone was able to make it to tonight's meeting. We have some very important topics to cover. I would like to especially thank Lucius Malfoy, who is here to provide us with more information on Voldemort's plan of attack in the future."  
  
The members applauded politely. Harry saw the man smile humbly at them, but return to his grave state as the members of the Order turned their attention back to Dumbledore. Harry frowned slightly as he saw the worried look on Draco's face, but forced himself to pay attention as he heard the Headmaster speak.  
  
"Now, the reason I called this meeting is to discuss the most recent attack. Several members were tipped off that Voldemort," he ignored the few flinches, "would attack a group of students and teachers traveling to Beauxbaton coming back from an expedition. When they arrived, well, why don't I ask one of the people who attended it to recollect the story?"  
  
He looked over to Remus, who cleared his throat. He gave Harry's arm a small squeeze, earning a confused glance from the boy in question.  
  
"Yes, well, I must say the attack wasn't pretty. When we arrived the Death Eaters were already closing in on the unsuspecting group. There were maybe 30 students and 6 teachers, but there were 40 Death Eaters," he watched the confusion pass through a few members faces, "I know it sounds like a lot, but the students there were 7th years, and knew how to defend themselves. I know what you're thinking now, that should have been plenty to defeat a band of Death Eaters. However, when we reached the spot of the attack, we found out exactly what we were dealing with. They had dementors with them," Remus said gravely.  
  
A collective gasp went through the room, except for Remus, Lucius, Kaz, and Draco. Harry had a look of horror on his face, and Remus looked sadly upon his best friend's son.  
  
"By the time we were able to force the Death Eaters to retreat, many of the students were dead and so were 3 teachers. In all, 10 students survived. We managed to get them into a small town near the school. We were all exhausted, fighting the dementors was bloody awful," Remus said, his head hanging low and his voice full of emotion.  
  
No one spoke for several moments. Harry watched as his beloved ex- teacher tried to pull himself together desperately. People shifted nervously from one foot to the other, wondering what he would say next. Finally, Lucius Malfoy's voice floated through the silence.  
  
"Remus...you don't have to continue if you aren't up t-" but Remus silenced him by holding up a hand.  
  
"I can do this. You all need to hear it," Remus replied stubbornly, "Though ten students survived, almost half of them were wounded. We originally traveled to the town with 4 teachers, but on the way, one of them collapsed. Apparently she had been wounded, but had not told anyone. I told the others to go ahead, and stayed with her until her last breath. I asked her what happened. She said she threw herself at a Death Eater who was deciding which person to kill next. She tried to curse them, but had never taken her wand out of her pocket. They cursed her in the side and slashed at her with a hidden knife located in their robes. When they were finished, she pulled out her wand and cursed them. The gash in her side was horrible, and the curse had hit her hard. "I asked her why she did it. She said to me, 'there are many reasons why we make the choices that we do. I have four main reasons. One, it had to be done. He's a dark wizard. Second, I had to protect the children. They were the most important thing at the moment. Third, I did it for the wizarding community. And finally, I did it for Harry Potter. He fended off the DarkLord for so long, I consider it repayment for protecting the people he cares about and the people he's never even met. When I die, remember that I did it for him. Our hero, our protector, our savior.' When she finished, she gave me a peaceful smile and drew her last breath. She died in my arms."  
  
Harry watched the man next to him. For the first time, he saw one of the people he most admired break down and cry. He looked away, and the words he had heard sunk in. She died. She died for him. A look of pure horror crossed his face. No...no no no!  
  
Draco watched his friend sadly as the Gryffindor tried best to hide the emotion in his face. Mustering up all the courage he could, Draco walked over quickly and placed a hand on Harry's shoulder. Harry looked up and tried to smile, but failed. Draco nodded and gave an encouraging smile, signaling he understood.  
  
"Harry, are you okay?" he asked gently.  
  
Harry gave him a pained look and began, "Draco, I-"  
  
"Excuse me? Mr. Potter?" a voice from behind cut off.  
  
Both boys turned to see a man in his late-20s. He was wearing jeans and a gray T-shirt. His brown eyes were a bit dull, and his long brown hair was pulled into a ponytail. He was smiling warmly.  
  
"Yes?" Harry asked calmly, the pain in his face instantly gone.  
  
"Hello. My name is Lucas. I was one of the people who fought the Death Eaters. I...um...I have a message for you," Lucas said nervously.  
  
"Who would be sending me a message?" Harry asked, shocked and confused.  
  
"It's from your friend. He said his name was Josh or Joe or." Lucas tried to recall.  
  
"JOHN?!" Harry almost yelled.  
  
"That's it!" Lucas said happily.  
  
"Oh god, is he alive? Please tell me!" Harry said urgently, ignoring the confused looks from Draco.  
  
"He's alive and well I assure you," Harry let out a sigh of relief, "He wanted me to tell you something. He said that he misses you, he wants you to write, and.um." Lucas trailed off nervously.  
  
Harry looked at the older man, eager to hear. John was alive, he couldn't believe it! To think, he was part of the party that was attacked. Harry had nearly had a heart attack.  
  
"Go on," Harry said.  
  
"He says...he says he's sorry about Kaylie, and that he still lo-"  
  
"Stop!" Harry yelled.  
  
Lucas looked on confused as Harry's happy expression transformed into a hurtful one. Many members had stopped their conversations at the outburst and were looking on.  
  
"What do you mean stop?" Lucas asked.  
  
"I don't want to hear it. I know what you're going to say, and I won't listen to it. Never in all my life...THAT BASTARD!" Harry cursed loudly.  
  
He stood up quickly, causing a stunned Draco to fall over. Tears were welling up in Harry's eyes. He swiped them away as calmly as he could, trying to ignore the fact that he was shaking. He looked around to find everyone looking at him.  
  
"I-I'm sorry, I must retire. I feel a bit fatigued. If you'll please excuse me," with that, Harry ran out of the room and down the stairs as fast as he could.  
  
All the members exchanged looks, some confused, others worried. Kaz was looking distressed, for she knew what Harry was so upset about. Draco, finally regaining his balance, turned to the group.  
  
"Uh...I think I'm going to go check up on him. Continue on, no need to worry," Draco said calmly before zooming after Harry.  
  
Many members blinked several times before returning to their earlier conversations. Kaz stared at the closed door.  
  
::Please let him be okay, please! Find him and take care of him Draco:: Kaz pleaded silently.  
  
~*  
  
Draco ran out into the corridor and looked around. Harry was no where to be seen. FUCK! How the hell was he going to find Harry now? Looking around frantically, he found a piece of parchment by his feet. He picked it up, scanned it, and his eyes went wide. It was a map of the entire school! His eyes went even wider when he saw various dots. One was labeled Severus Snape, and was down in the dungeons. HE saw dots with various names in the Headmasters office. He looked over the map in panic, trying to find the dot of Harry. Yes! There it was. It was headed for.the battlements? What would he be going there fo-  
  
::Oh my god:: was Draco's only thought as he raced down the hall.  
  
5 minutes later Draco had climbed the last step. He had been moving at almost lightening-fast speed, not caring that his limbs were screaming out in pain. He leaned against the wall, trying to steady his breathing, while at the same time trying to find Harry. With his breathing relatively normal again, he finally saw Harry. Wind was blowing at his cloak. There was a knife in his left hand, dripping with blood. Draco stood paralyzed as Harry took a step closer to the edge. Then another.and another.and another. He stepped up onto the ledge. His hands gripped the side, and then he let one go.  
  
Draco finally snapped out of his trance and ran forward.  
  
"HARRY!"  
  
~*  
  
Six: .and that's where I'm leaving you. Sorry if they don't call it battlements, I couldn't remember what they call it...  
  
Draco: WHAT?! HOW COULD YOU LEAVE IT THERE?!  
  
Lee-chan: *snickers*  
  
Six: *shrugs* I felt like leaving you with a cliffhanger. So what?  
  
Draco: *shakes Six* So what?! SO WHAT?! LISTEN HERE MISSY, I-  
  
Six: *covers Draco's mouth with her hand* Lee-chan, get me a sock or something to shut him up.  
  
Lee-chan: *salutes and stuffs a sock into Draco's mouth*  
  
Six: Thank you. I'm finally done with chapter 7!!! I should have gone on with it, but 1) I ran out of time (I kept my promise!) and 2) I felt like giving you people a little suspense. I want to thank Kyle for giving me the motivation I needed to actually finish this chapter, thanks man! Oh, and the next update will be late. For this I am certain.  
  
Lee-chan: Care to explain why?  
  
Six: *sticks out tongue* I was just getting there. I'm going on a school trip to Mystic CT for a couple of days. I'm leaving early on Wednesday and coming back late on Friday. Oddly enough, those are my only free days besides Saturday to write the chapter. So, it will be belated.  
  
And a final note:  
  
REVIEW!!!!!!! Please? 


	9. Chapter 8

Lee-chan: So, Six finally decided to get off her lazy ass and finish the chapter!

Six: *pulls her hair back into a ponytail* Hey, don't yell at me! But yes, I did. And here it is. Heh heh, I got some wonderful reviews from last chapter's cliffhanger. I must say it was very fun reading them! You must notice, I'm experimenting with POVs, so bear with me. Okay, on to the normal Pre-chappie shit.

Thanks to: Everyone who reviewed! You people are the greatest! I know it took a long time to get this chappie out, but part of that is FF.net's fault. Though, I'm very glad they're back *hugs*

Special Comments:

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Prophetess of Hearts: Heh heh, you'll see who John is *evil grin*

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Psychotic Flying Monkey: Um…actually I'm not trying to kill you. I like cliffhangers, what can I say? XD.

Dedication: Gosh, I actually dedicated this chapter to someone! This chappie goes out to my girl **Kara** cause she's the best friend a girl could ask for! Plus, she made me a CD with Incubus and Dashboard Confessional on it, and she has nothing to do this summer (like me). Thanks girl! This chappie goes out to you! Hope you like!

Disclaimer: Same old shit applies. I down own anything but the plot and my OCs that pop up everywhere (I swear, I didn't mean to have this many!). I don't own the lyrics to Creed's "One Last Breath", I just like the lyrics.

Personal feelings on this chapter: Love the beginning, hate the ending. Sorry!

Eh heh, I'm bugging you by putting so much stuff aren't I? ^_^

Warnings: *cackles evilly* You just have to see for yourself!!!!

* * *

"He says…he says he's sorry about Kaylie, and that he still lo-"

"Stop!" I yelled.

Oh, hell no. I was _not_ going through that again. No matter what John says. I just couldn't take it. What he had done to me…I couldn't even begin to explain. After all he had done, that bastard was trying to come crawling back to me. Well, not this time.

"What do you mean stop?" Lucas asked, confusion in his voice.

"I don't want to hear it. I know what you're going to say, and I won't listen to it. Never in all my life…THAT BASTARD!" I practically screamed the last part.

I acknowledged the fact that I was getting weird looks from my colleagues, and that Kaz was looking at me in concern and pity. I ignored them. I also knew that I had unshed tears in my eyes. I tried to ignore them too, but to no avail. It was too much. I needed to get out of there.

"I-I'm sorry, I must retire. I feel a bit fatigued. If you'll please excuse me," I stuttered, rushing to make my escape.

I had barely finished my sentence before bolting out of the room. The tears were threatening to fall. I couldn't cry in front of them. The Golden Boy wasn't even supposed to cry. I have saved the world over and over, I've faced horrors many people could not imagine, and yet I was not allowed to cry. Oh, the irony of it all.

Remus' words had finally sunk in by that time. That woman. She had died for me. She fought a band of Death Eaters and lost. All for me. It was all my fault that she died. Just like the rest of them that had died. It hurt. It hurt so badly. The pain that filled me, it was excruciating. Everything that had happened to me over the past 15 years came rushing back, overloading my senses. I couldn't breath. I had to stop it.

Though I was dizzy, I could still see straight. Where could I go? The common room? No, too many people. The dungeons? Snape probably put up spells while he attended the meeting. The Great Hall? That was out, I had seen the house elves cleaning up and preparing for breakfast. Well, if I couldn't decide where to go, I'd let my feet carry me. And that's just what I did. I started walking, consumed in my own thoughts.

Before I knew it I was at a staircase. But which one? I looked up. A door? Careful not to make a sound, I slipped up the stairs and pushed open the door. Instantly I was hit by a cold gust of wind. I looked around. I was on the top of the castle! The battlements to be precise. I huddled up next to a wall, and took out my knife. Sure, it was a stupid risk, taking it to the meeting with me, but I did…just in case. I pulled up the sleeve of my knife and started.

Pain flowed through my body. I felt that sense of relief creeping in my veins. I looked at my blade, admiring the way it still gleamed in the ever-so-faint moonlight, despite the fact it was covered in my tainted, dirty blood. I looked at the moon, the way it seemed to pulsate with light. My vision moved to the horizon, so dark and wicked looking. And then…I finally saw the edge. The idea hit me like a ton of bricks. I stood up quickly and took a step forward.

That was it. That was my answer. The way to end all my pain. It was right in front of me the whole time. It was so simple! All I had to do was take a few steps, and hop off the edge. I calculated the distance from him and the edge.

6 feet.

A song popped into my head. I couldn't remember the name, or anything else but the chorus. But that was all I needed. I began softly.

"Hold me now. I'm 6 feet from the edge and I'm thinking, maybe 6 feet, ain't so far down," I sang quietly.

How ironic life can be. It amazed me. The words were true. So uncanny it was scary. There was only one little thing that stuck out in my head. He wasn't going to hold me. He never would. He would never love me. I knew that love was impossible. So, I would just end it all before I fucked up and did something stupid, like open my heart to him and get back a slap in the face. I would die before I let that happen. So I that's what I would do.

Another line of the song came to me as I stepped a bit closer to the edge. I sang with more strength this time.

"I cried out, Heaven save me! But I'm down to one last breath," I sang a bit louder, "Hold me now. I'm 6 feet from the edge and I'm thinking, maybe 6 feet, ain't so far down."

Oh, if only I believed in Heaven. Even if I had, I knew I would be going to Hell. I'd done too much to earn the respect and love of God. But I didn't believe in those things, and that is probably what damned me even more. It's a pity really. To finally figure out that you have nothing to believe in. I wondered for a split second what it would have been like if I had had a normal life. Well, we would never know now, would we?

By that time I was up on the ledge, my hands gripping the stone and my knuckles were white. I stopped for a moment. I looked down at my bloody wrists, watching the droplets fall helplessly to the stone. I looked ahead of me, and watched the leaves of the trees shake gently. I looked down, and saw only blackness. Perfect.

But wait. Was I really going to do this? Was this finally the end for me? Was I going to give up everything I owned, everything I believed, even the people I loved?

Yes, I was.

I released a hand. And for the first time in my life, I said a prayer. I said a prayer for everyone who had left me behind and didn't even realize it. For Ron and Hermione, for Albus Dumbledore, Sirius and Remus. For Draco, I prayed hard, hoping whatever higher power there was graced him with love and contentment. I even said one for John, who I would have usually damned to hell. But I just couldn't. No matter how much anger and resentment I felt, in my last moments, I couldn't do that. I said one for all the students and teachers in the school. I prayed for the people who were forced to do things they never wanted, and the people who let their emotions get in the way of their vision. I prayed for the souls of the lost, and for the souls who would find happiness.

"Harry…"

Funny, I thought I heard someone call me. It sounded a bit like Draco. The wind must have been playing tricks on me. Damn it, even in my last moments I was still loving him so much it hurt. I would have cursed the wind, but it was too innocent to be blamed for something like that. Goodbye world, I hope you live a happier life now that I will be gone. Please take care of yourself. As I felt the grip of my other hand loosen, a strange feeling came over me. One I hadn't felt in a long time.

Peace.

I let the other hand go.

~* //Draco//

I couldn't believe what I was seeing. Harry was trying to commit suicide. He was going to jump off the castle and onto the ground. How could he? Oh, I never knew it was that bad.

As I watched his hand leave the ledge, I became aware that he was singing. What song, I didn't know. I heard the words, and my blood ran cold. I watched the love of my entire life drop one hand. I couldn't move. No, I ihad/i to.

He let the other hand go.

I tore towards him and grabbed his waist as he leaned forward. Pulling with all my might, we stumbled onto the stone, him on top of me. He struggled fiercely to get away, but I locked my hand around his wrist and held on tight. After a few minutes, he fell limp, breathing heavily. I saw the raven-haired boy look down and gasp.

~* //Harry//

What the hell? One second I was falling forward and the next I was backwards on top of somebody! I felt the hands grab onto my waist and pull me back. DAMN IT! Someone was going to pay for this.

I struggled endlessly. I wanted to shout at them to let me go, but my voice just wasn't working. The only thing I could really do was whimper and whine. Ugh, I hated it when I acted like a baby. After a couple minutes, I gave up. What was the use of struggling? The person's grip just got tighter when I did. If they let their guard down, maybe I could sneak away from them.

But before I did that, I needed to know who it was. I couldn't not know. So, I turned my head to look at the figure below me. I couldn't help but gasp. It was Draco.

No! Shit! NO! He wasn't supposed to be here!

"D-D-Draco? W-What might you be doing up here at this hour?" I tried to sound cool and collective, but couldn't stop the stuttering.

He stared at me with an expression of disbelief. I felt the heat rise to my cheeks. Why? I'll be damned if I know. He finally moved, pushing himself up while I was in his lap. If this had been any other situation, I would have been grinning stupidly.

"What the hell did you think you were doing?!" he screeched at me.

I was at a loss for words. So, I did the only thing I could think of. I looked at my lap. It's a sort of defensive gesture for me. When I do that you can't see my eyes. My eyes, those are the things that betray me. They let everyone know how I feel.

"Harry," Draco said gently, calmly, "Harry, look at me."

No, I wouldn't look at him. I would not submit myself to those gorgeous eyes. I knew that if I did, something terrible would happen. Or, so I thought.

"Harry," he said more forcefully this time, "Look at me now."

His fingers found my chin and forced my head up to his level. I quickly closed my eyes. I would not let him see my eyes. I wouldn't!

"Harry, please. I'm begging you. Look at me!" he pleaded.

I'd always known he was one of my weaknesses. Just the thought of him could make my knees turn to water. At that moment, I could not even **begin** to explain how much my heart broke when I heard his tone. It was so desperate. I gave in. I looked at him.

His eyes were so beautiful. They reminded me so much of the winter sky. So gray and cool, but in a good way. Now these eyes were filled with concern, confusion and pain. I had caused him pain. I wanted to look away, but I couldn't.

"Why?" he asked softly.

Why…why…that was the eternal question. I felt anger well up inside of me. Not for him, but for the world.

"Why? WHY?! Draco, do you have any idea what this hell I call my pathetic life is like?" I yelled, scrambling to stand up.

I didn't want to yell. Yelling made me more upset. But I couldn't help it. The memories were suffocating. I was so sick and tired of it all.

"No, I don't. But you do," was the soft reply, "And I want to know."

I stared at him. His face was so genuine. Could I trust him with my secrets? I didn't know. But something inside of me was saying yes. So, I took the risk. I spoke.

"You may regret it later," I said.

"There are very many things in my life that I have reason to regret. You, on the other hand, are not one of them," he replied.

Again I stared. What exactly was he implying? I shook my head. I'd just have to figure that out later.

"Despite what you might think, my home life is not all that glamorous," I began bitterly, "I might be a hero here, but with those muggles, I'm a nobody. In fact, I'm less than a nobody. My aunt Petunia, my mother's sister, has been disgusted by our kind ever since my mother got her letter. Well, to say disgusted would be an understatement. Her husband Vernon, and I refused to call him uncle, is worse than her. He hates anything that has to do with our kind, that includes owls. So you can imagine how much he hates Hedwig. They have a son, Dudley. He was brought up to hate me. He thinks that I'll somehow get more attention and presents from him, which is entirely impossible. But he doesn't care. For ten years, those people were the only family I'd ever had.

"They treated me awfully. I didn't know it then, but my magic would act up when I was scared or hurt, which back then was a lot. They would send me to my cupboard with no meals for a certain amount of days if they thought I went out of line. Yes, I said cupboard," I said, seeing the look on Draco's face, "It was under the stairs next to the kitchen and that was where I slept each night. When my letters to Hogwarts started to arrive, they moved me to Dudley's second bedroom, which is just as much a prison cell as the cupboard only bigger. I didn't have any friends at the muggle schools I went to. Dudley made sure of that. When I started at Hogwarts, I felt like a caged bird being freed. It was the first time I could be around people who would judge me without the shadow of my cousin hanging over them. I didn't know much about this world, and even though I was scared, I was ready."

I was careful not to mention anything about our past meeting on the train. Many nights I would look back on it and not understand why I didn't take his hand. Sure there were reasons, but did we have to be enemies?

"The first 4 years were, well, I don't know how to describe them. They had their ups and downs. I was happy. I didn't let all the bad things that happen to me get in the way of being me. But after our 4th year, something changed. I couldn't be happy anymore. Cedric's death loomed over my head all the time. And it didn't help that Vernon was getting angrier. He started to get physically violent," I shivered at the thought, "It was horrible. It was like the Criticius Curse, except that a few days later I could still see the scars. It reminded me how pitiful I was. How weak, that I could survive the evil Voldemort, but couldn't even stand up to my own uncle. He got even more upset after he found out about John."

~* //Draco//

There was that name again. Who was this guy? And what did he have to do with my Harry? I was itching to find out.

"You've mentioned his name before. Who is he?" I asked.

His eyes grew slightly warmer, then colder before shutting off any other emotion except for pain. His eyes could tell me almost anything. I stared at him as he struggled to find the words.

"John Owens. He moved in when I came back to the Dursleys. Blonde hair, blue eyes, and a perfect smile. For almost a week I saw him, but never spoke to him. He was always looking at me, searching my face for something. One day, I was outside staring up at the sky. It was one of the rare days where all of the Dursleys weren't home, even Dudley. And suddenly, his face was above mine. That's when it started. We got to talking. He told me he was a wizard too, training at Beauxbaton. He was about to start his 7th year. We told each other our life stories, though he already knew parts of the story. After about a week and a half, he asked me out. I couldn't answer. Sure, I liked him But, well, there was someone else. Someone I still love now in fact. But I was giving up hope on them, so I said yes to John eventually. I think he knew that I wasn't totally his, but he didn't care. The next month…wasn't mind-blowing. We saw each other frequently. But I was depressed. I hid it from him, but my relationship wasn't helping my depression like I thought it would. And then, he did the worst thing a person could do to me."

I blinked. He was in love with someone? My heart sank. I pushed aside the feeling. Right now he needed a friend, and that's what I would be.

"What did he do?" I asked carefully.

"He fell in love with someone else. With a girl. But that's not what hurt most. I came over to his house one day to find them making out on his couch. He had cheated on me. The girl, Kaylie, had no idea what was going on. I remember the day well," his eyes clouded over, as if the memories were replaying in front of his eyes, "It was about a month later. I entered the living room, just like I had always done. There they were, on his couch, kissing like there was no tomorrow. I swear, my jaw must have hit the floor. He had always told me how much he loved me. What had changed? He looked up, and I saw no regret in his eyes. It pierced right through me. He stood up and just started telling me off. He said I was just too immature for him and that I needed to grow up. He said it was my fault, that I screwed up the relationship. And I…I just stood there and took it. I took all his verbal abuse, and didn't say one thing back. When he was done, I ran out of the house. I stayed in my room for a week. I didn't eat, not that the Dursleys noticed. Vernon was beating me more and more, disgusted by the fact that he was housing a bisexual wizard. A boy who liked boys. It was the ultimate insult to him. I stole a knife from the kitchen one night. That's when it really started."

~* //Harry//

I don't know why I did what I did next. Just something in the back of my head screamed show him. So I did. I pulled up my sleeves, exposing my entire arm. Scars lined my pale flesh and the blood from before was starting to dry out. If you're wondering if I had an epiphany at that moment, you're wrong. My face was emotionless as I stared at the scars of my past, my present, and even possibly, my future. I looked up to see Draco's eyes widen considerably. He touched them lightly with his fingertips, covering the tips with blood, and I shivered.

"Bloody hell Harry," he breathed, "Don't you know how dangerous this is?!"

I look at my heads in sorrow. I made him mad at me. Damn it, why did this always have to happen? I always make everyone mad.

"What if you had hit an artery? Or lost too much blood?" he said wildly.

"You don't understand. No one does. No one understands that by doing this, I don't feel the pain inside. The pain here," I put my hand over my heart, "Don't you see?"

He stayed silent. I suppose I was grateful. You know that epiphany that was supposed to happen when you do something like this? Well, it started to hit me. Hard. I started crying, finally realizing what I had done to my arm.

"I just want the pain to go away. Do you know what it's like to have the shadow of death hanging over your head wherever you go?" I was pleading now. Maybe I wanted someone to know.

"Yes I do," he said quietly, and I had to strain to hear, "But you can't let it get to you. You have to trudge along and make the best of it."

I couldn't speak. He was right. Deep down inside I knew he was. Damn it…

I felt his arms go around me in a loose hug. I leaned into him, his chest supporting my weight. I felt his warmth radiate from him and creep into my body. It felt so good. I sighed a bit mournfully. I knew that eventually he would let go and leave me in my world of cold and darkness once again. He hugged me tighter.

"You said you were in love with someone," he whispered in my ear, "Who is it? Can you tell me?"

His hot breath tickled my ear and I shivered again. Could I tell him? Could I reveal my deepest secret to him? What if he rejected me? Well, I was already telling him more about myself than anyone else knew. One more secret wouldn't hurt, would it? I was given this opportunity for a reason, and I sure as hell wasn't about to waste it.

"It started in my 4th year. The first time I saw him laugh. I thought he was so gorgeous…" I said quietly.

He touched my arm gently and asked, "Tell me?"

"The person I love is…" my voice was barely above a whisper, "The person I love is you."

There, I said it. What happened now? That was up to him. I watched him as he took in a deep breath, shock in his eyes. I lowered my head and waited for the rejection to come. But the funny thing was, it didn't. I looked up, curious. The next thing I knew, his lips were on mine.

Holy shit. Draco was kissing me. DRACO was kissing ME. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. I did neither, I just eased into his warm, gentle kiss. To me, it lasted forever. I never wanted it to end. Eventually we broke for air and I sat there stunned.

~* //Draco//

Oh. My. God.

HE LOVES ME!!!!!

My mind barely registered that fact before my body took action. My lips brushed his, and he responded eagerly. My heart did cartwheels inside my chest. I couldn't believe it, my biggest fantasy had come true. Granted, the scenario wasn't exactly like I pictured it, but screw it! I was kissing Harry, and that was all that mattered.

Soon enough I realized that my lungs were on fire and I slowly and reluctantly broke our kiss. I panted for breath, and he just sat there. Apparently I had shocked him. Excellent. I rested my forehead against his, and he looked at me with shinning eyes.

"Is…is this real?" he whispered hoarsely.

I had no other answer, so I said with complete honesty, "Yes."

"I love you," again it was barely audible from his lips. I smiled.

"I love you too," I said.

He smiled. A genuine, full-blown smile. One I hadn't seen in so long. He leaned against me, and I hugged him tightly, afraid to let go. We sat like that for a while, and I watched the moon. When I finally looked down, I saw his eyes were closed and his breathing was deep and even. He was asleep. To tell the truth, I wasn't surprised. Tonight had been an exhausting night for both of us. I yawned, thinking it would be a good idea to go back to the dorm and sleep. But what about Harry? I couldn't bring him back to the commonroom, there could have been people still there. I was too exhausted to bring him to the hospital wing, I would have to force him to go tomorrow. So, I gathered him gently in my arms and started to walk.

The trip back to my dorm was excruciating. My legs were screaming in pain from the loss of circulation when Harry sat in my lap. I called out the password to the painting of Melindora Blackhand, one of the most famous potion masters in the 19th century. No one was in the commonroom anymore. Despite people's suspicions, we don't stay up all night. In fact, we go to bed earliest out of all houses. I dragged myself up the stairs and for the first time that year, thanked my father for getting me my own room. Placing him softly next to me, I slid under the sheets and drifted slowly off to sleep, happier than I had ever been.

* * *

Six: *breaths sigh of relief* There, it's done.

Lee-chan: *whistles* Damn girl…

Harry: *reads chapter and faints, collapsing on the floor*

Draco: *rushes over to Harry's limp form* Harry! It's all your fault! *points finger accusingly*

Six: *growls* You better quit pointing before I break more than just that finger

Draco: *squeaks, brings back finger and shuts up*

Lee-chan: *laughs*

Six: Melindora Blackhand is a fusion of two characters names from the series _The Last Rune_. Good series by the way.

Lee-chan: Now remember people, drop us a review! We love them and the more we get, the harder Six works!

Draco: *mumbles something that sounds oddly like 'That's not saying much'*

Lee-chan: Do I have to go get that hammer?! You better shut up.

Six: REVIEW!

Draco: *tries in vain to get Harry to regain consciousness*


	10. Chapter 9

****

Disclaimer: The only thing I've ever really owned in my life was a picture of Sean Biggerstaff, so you can imagine that don't own any characters from the Harry Potter world.

Chapter 9 of Gray Skies and Emerald Eyes – A Look into Someone Else's World

"Albus, this is serious! He has scars all up and down his arms, thighs and ankles! There are new ones too! Whatever happened to him last night must have been so awful! I was worried he wouldn't make it through the night, he had lost so much blood! His breathing was so shallow, but that's not all I found! On the back of his right leg, there's a large scar that goes from the knee _all the way up his thigh_! I just know he didn't do that!"

"Poppy-"

"Something has happened to him Albus. I can just feel it. How could we have been so careless?"

"Please Poppy, don't cry. I will see what I can do."

Madame Pomfrey was not a mean person. Really, she wasn't. She was an expert at diagnosing injuries and assigning the right medicine. She was considerate of the students that came to the hospital wing with a wide range of maladies, from zits to whole bones being removed.

She knew about the talk that went around. How all the students called her crabby and old. How she was one of the meanest staff members around. How she never gave them candy, it was always fruit. How her concoctions tasted horrible, and burned their throat on the way down. How they were hardly every allowed to visit friends when doing homework. But she was not a mean person. She just knew when to draw the line between pampering a patient and helping them.

And Harry Potter was someone she needed to help.

It was 5am on a Saturday morning when he had been brought in. Not surprisingly, by the young Mr. Malfoy. The young Potter was fast asleep in the other boy's arms, a smile on his thin, delicate lips. He looked worse than she had ever remembered seeing him before, and that was saying something. There were dark circles under his eyes, and from what she could see he had been, at some point or another, crying heavily. Mr. Malfoy had just stared at her with blank eyes, hiding all emotion. A trick he had picked up from his father, no doubt.

She had ushered him to the bed in the farthest corner, where he placed Harry onto the sheets with a carefulness she had not seen in the boy since he had come to Hogwarts. From the look in his eyes she could see things were different. Very different. She wondered if it was for the better.

"Mr. Malfoy…" she had said in a whisper as to not awaken Harry, "May I inquire as to what this is all about? And why exactly you are out of bed at 5:15 in the morning?"

"Please Madame, not now! We need to change the bandages on his wrists," was the boy's rather urgent reply.

She looked at him blankly as he carefully took Harry's arm and pulled up the sleeve of his robe. His skin was covered in a tight white bandage. He carefully peeled back the sticky material, and Madame Pomfrey was very glad she had taught herself not to gasp. Blood caked the wound and bandage, and it was obvious that the blood had not yet completely clotted. She recovered quite quickly from her shock, a task that came in very handy for situations just like this, and went to work. A few minutes later she had cleansed the wound and had wrapped it in a new bandage. Securing it, she turned back to Draco.

"Mr. Malfoy, if you do not explain what in Merlin's name is going on this very instant I swear I'll send you straight to Du-"

"Madame, no! I can't see the headmaster just yet! Just let me explain," his voice was calm but there was a look of pleading in his gray eyes.

"Fine. Let's go to my office."

He nodded. She walked off, but didn't not notice the glance he gave Harry before walking off. She was aware of the two's friendship, but the look he had given Harry worried her. Something told her this was way beyond her previous knowledge of the two. She closed the door to her office and gestured to the chair in front of her desk, which he seemed to gladly sink into. She sat in her own chair, shifting rather uncomfortably in the soft leather.

"Mr. Malfoy. Let us get one thing straight. You are not setting a foot out of this office until you tell me what in the bloody hell is going on!" she didn't usually swear, but it was 5:25 in the morning, and she was tired.

"Look at his chest," was all the young boy said.

"E-Excuse me?" she stuttered, shocked by his rather quick reply.

"I said, look at his chest. Look at his legs, then his arms, then his neck. After that, look at his wrists, ankles, and thighs. I assume you can figure it all out," he said quietly.

"I…" she pondered for a moment before finishing, "I don't understand what you're saying."

"Oh bloody hell woman! He's been abused this summer by his godforsaken pork-bellied excuse for an uncle! There are bruises that just _won't go away_! He's been so depressed that he's been cutting! Some of those scars are still new! HE TRIED TO _KILL_ HIMSELF TONIGHT!"

She stared at him, the information he had just given not sinking in. Draco's faced flashed with realization of what he had just done, and suddenly it was flushed with horror. His mouth was gaping, and his gaze was turned inward.

"Mr. Malfoy…" she started gently.

"No…" he whispered.

Silently she rose, ignoring the student's questioning looks. Malfoys had been known to lie before, but not like this. She swept out of the room, more menacing then she probably meant. She faintly heard the young man scurry after her, his uneasiness so thick she could almost taste it. Not a good sign. She walked calmly to her young patient's bed and drew back the curtains. She sucked in a sharp breath. She had been so busy tending to his wrists that she had not gotten a good look at the boy. And what she saw was definitely not good. From through his robes, she could see ribs sticking out dangerously through the skin, his arm has a huge greenish-yellow bruise, and his complexion was far too pale for her liking.

"Mr. Malfoy, if you would kindly return to your dormitory, I will take care of things from here. Thank you for your-"

"NO! I'm not leaving!"

"Mr. Malfoy!" Poppy's eyes flashed and her voice was hard, "You will return to your bed and get some sleep or else I will not only inform the Headmaster of whatever the hell has occurred her on this night, but you'll have detention for the next month!"

Draco had been so shocked that he took an involuntary step back. Casting one withered look at the young man on the bed, he turned and swept out of the Infirmary. Poppy sighed before turning back to her patient. With a wave of her wand, she conjured up a hot cup of coffee, knowing it was going to be a while until she rested.

The memory still burned in her brain as she listed off the conditions to a serious looking Dumbledore. His eyes were hard and almost, in a sense, dead. Poppy was extremely frightened.

"What should we do Albus? What in all the Hells is going _on_?" Poppy asked in a strangled voice.

"All will be revealed in good time, my friend. For now, we will let the boy rest. He needs it," Albus said in a sorrowful voice.

Poppy turned her gaze back to the Boy-Who-Was-Currently-Hospitalized. She had a feeling that the next few months were not going to be easy.

~~

I apologize that this chapter is so short. I had major writer's block, and transition chapters are not very fun to write. I hope you enjoyed this just a little bit, feedback is always nice!


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